


Grey

by Rizzleslvr72



Series: Black, White and Grey [3]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-27
Updated: 2013-06-05
Packaged: 2017-12-09 16:08:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 33,560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/776152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rizzleslvr72/pseuds/Rizzleslvr72
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Final story in the Black, White, and Grey series. Post curse but with none of the convoluted mess of this season. Regina isn't herself and Emma is desperate for a return to normalcy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I know it's been a while. This one is a little unconventional. It's a stand alone but it goes with the whole color theme of Black, White (my other SQ stories), and Grey. This is post curse, but I have ignored the convoluted story line of this season for something of my own. This means there is no Cora, Hook and no visit to FTL. Regina is in a form you've never seen her in before, but then again so is Emma. I do keep the irritating Charmings and Henry makes a strong appearance. I hope you enjoy.

Leaning back in her chair, Emma peered at her best friend, picturing her in wolf form. She could practically see the fur standing up and hear the accompanying snarl. The object of Red’s ire sat in oblivion. Regina’s eyes were downcast and her demeanor somewhat meek. Emma still held out hope. When these two got together in the past, it was always fire to kindling, with Regina emerging the solid victor every time.

The noises of the other patrons of The Rabbit Hole buzzed around them. Some still stared at the spectacle that was the Evil Queen and White Knight while others seemed to not give a damn. Emma ignored them all in favor for the potential fireworks in front of her. She wanted this…needed this.

So, Emma watched and waited as if she were a spectator at a tennis match or the fish in a barrel that was Nascar. Regina had not been herself for some time despite Emma’s best attempts to yank her from her self-imposed shell.

“Why did you invite me here if she was coming?!” Red hissed.

Emma raised a brow and held up a finger as she downed her second tequila shot for the night. It trickled down her throat, scorching her insides before settling in her belly warmly. “I sleep with her every night. Why wouldn’t I want her with me?”

Dark eyes narrowed. It was common knowledge that there were those who thought their pairing was ludicrous or just another strategic move by a woman who would never change her spots no matter what she presented to the world.  Red was one of those people.

“Uhh, I need to wash that image out of my brain!”  Red exclaimed as she guzzled her own drink.  “She’s like a fucking praying mantis! I don’t see how you do it.”

Emma’s eyes tracked from one brunette to the other.  Red had made the first move, but it was time for Regina to obliterate her from the game completely.  In a few seconds, she would have her Regina back. A better plan would have been to using her mother, but there was an ocean under that bridge. Emma knew she had no right to tinker with it.  This was the alternative. A tingle started low in Emma’s stomach and she licked her lips…waiting.  Waiting.

Emma held her breath as Regina rose from her chair and flicked dark tresses from her eyes, revealing a near blank expression. The only tell was the clenching of her jaw. “My drink needs refilling. Would anyone else like one?”

Unable to stop it, Emma’s jaw dropped.  She blinked, hoping that when she opened her eyes things would be back to normal…Regina would be back to normal.

Regina glanced at her, but the gaze was fleeting and almost unreadable.

“Yeah,” Emma answered. “Bring me the damn bottle.”

Regina’s only reply was a brisk nod.

 Emma sighed and slumped into her chair.

“Okay, I know she’s been hiding out in her mansion on the hill, but, what the fuck was that?” Red asked. “She usually takes my head off for looking at her funny.”

Emma shrugged. “She hasn’t really been the same since the curse was lifted.  I thought it would change when we finally---“

“Uck, don’t say it.” Red interrupted. “But she did get her ass handed to her. Must suck being on the losing side.” She added with glee.

Emma looked at her friend slyly. “She used to have some good days but now, nothing. It might help knock something loose if you turned up the snark a bit.”

Red snorted. “Me?! The fights between you used to be epic.”

“Tried that. Besides my mother, you seem to have a special place in her heart. She loves cutting you off at the knees.”

“Please, her heart? The tin man couldn’t help that bitch even if he wanted to.”  Red added.

Emma winced but pushed forward. “Come on, please. It’s not like I’m asking you to go out of your way here.”

Brown eyes rolled then stared as if contemplating. “You like her mean. Don’t you?”

“No! I like her being herself. Right now, she seems so defeated---“

“She was!” Red hissed.

“I know that! But I’ve never seen Regina give up on anything. Hell, even in your world, after all that shit happened to her, she kicked ass and took names.”

“Hey!”

Emma waved her hand in supplication. “I’m not excusing what happened. I’m just saying that’s what she does.”

“So…you want her to come back and curse us all over again?!”

Emma rubbed the bridge of her nose then skimmed the lines in her forehead. They stared at each other. Red was the first to look away.

“Okay…that was stupid. I totally thought it was my inside voice.”

“I feel like shit, okay? Asking you to do this. I should be patient and wait for her to snap out of it, but I’m not a patient person. She won’t really talk to me. She’s in there somewhere, and I need her to come out bitch and all so we can deal with this. Other than giving her an ultimatum, I don’t know what to do.”

Red glared. “I can’t believe I’m saying this because it is Regina. You’re right this is kind of a shitty thing to do. What about going to see The Cricket?”

Emma glared right back.

“Oh yeah, because it’s Regina.”

“So, are you going to do this?” Emma asked.

“I guess but only because you asked so nicely.”  Red grinned.

Emma felt some of the tension leave her body. This was a convoluted plan, but it was a convoluted situation. She looked up in time to see Regina weaving her way back toward them. The crowd parted as if by magic. This time was no different than all the others just the sight of the brunette was enough to take her breath despite the circumstances.

Their eyes met, and Emma could feel the slow boil that had always been between them. It twisted her  belly and showered her with electric tendrils of awareness. The link was abruptly broken as Regina looked down and away.

An exasperated sigh whisked passed Emma’s lips and she was resigned to the knowledge that this could blow up in her face either one way or the other.  A few seconds later, a bottle of tequila appeared in front of her. She was tempted to just start swigging straight from it.

Red studied her new drink and then glanced at Regina.  “Maybe I should have you test it.”

The pulse in Regina’s jaw continued to tick but her forehead scrunched in what could only be mock confusion.  “I assure you—“

Red laughed. “I wouldn’t even trust you with my shoes.”

Regina’s face reddened.

Emma felt like slinking under the table but held her ground.  Eyes that usually held such fire peered at her dull as dishwater. There wasn’t even a spark. “Regina, I—“ Emma started.

Regina removed her gaze. “I guess I deserved that.”

Emma could see Regina’s hands fisting in her lap. Her knuckles were white.

“What you deserve? Please. We could start on a list right now since you seem to be feeling generous.”

Emma gasped. She didn’t expect Red to go there.

Regina stood once more, but somehow, she seemed smaller. “I-I need to use the facilities.”

Then, she was gone again, leaving behind the scent of defeat and expensive perfume.

Emma slammed her hand against the table hard enough to make it rattle. “Fuck!”  She glared at Red accusingly even though she didn’t have the right to. “You had to go there?!”

“Hell yes! You’re my best friend. I love you, but I hate her Emma. I’m going to show it every chance I get.”

“Even if it hurts me?”

Red scoffed. “You’re a fucking hypocrite.”  She downed her drink before getting up and walking away.

Emma pushed her hands through thick curls. It had all been so easy, saving everyone in this town. She had stumbled into it. The hardest thing had been slaying the dragon, and even that was achieved by pure luck with no actual skill whatsoever. She never wanted the job as The Savior, but she wanted Regina.

This…this was work, saving Regina…loving Regina. Emma sucked down another shot before rising. Doubt permeated her very core. Maybe the former Evil Queen was too broken to be fixed. Hell, maybe they both were. Anger bubbled with each step. It turned inward as she was reminded once more that she didn’t really know how to love…not anymore.  A normal woman would be patient. A normal woman would respect Regina’s pain, but Emma knew she was far from normal.

Emma pushed the door of the bathroom open. Her eyes zeroed in on Regina just as they always did. She stood near the sink, looking down at her hands as she washed them vigorously. There were a few stragglers peering at the woman’s back in disgust.  “Get out. Now!”  The sheriff growled.

Emma got a certain satisfaction at seeing them scurry away like flies. She locked the door.

In the mirror, green met brown.

“I’m sorry….about Red. She went too far.”

Regina switched off the faucet and turned. “It doesn’t matter.”

Rage gushed forward. “It doesn’t---“ Emma sputtered. “She was tearing you another asshole in there, and you barely bat an eyelash.”

“Neither did you.” Regina countered.

“You’re the Evil fucking Queen. You can take care of yourself.  Hell, you could probably make her piss herself with a look if you wanted to! I know a lot has happened, but what the actual fuck, Regina!”  Emma closed the distance between them, needing to be closer despite her discontent.

“Miss Swan, what would be the point?” Regina asked, but it lacked the vitriol she was capable of spewing. She stood there  shoulders slumped and completely lacking the regal bearing that had been her trademark.

As irrational as it was, the question cranked Emma’s anger up another notch. “Don’t you Miss Swan me! It doesn’t even have the same bite anymore. You won’t talk to me. You won’t let me touch you. Who the hell are you?!”

Regina’s eyes flashed briefly. “So you thought playing games like a petulant child would return normalcy?”

Emma’s mouth fell open. She should have known Regina would figure it out. Was she being childish? “If that’s what it takes, yeah.”

Without another word, Regina headed toward the door.  Moving quickly, Emma blocked it. She reached out grasping Regina’s forearm. The air around them became heavy.  “You’re not leaving.”

“I can’t do this.”

“No, I can’t do THIS anymore.” The words tumbled out of her mouth, and Emma let them. Weariness seeped into her bones.

Dark eyes widened and filled with devastation. “Emma—“

“No.” Emma shook her head. “I don’t know what I’m doing, and you’re not doing anything to help, Regina. The woman I know…the woman I love doesn’t give up. So you lost, but do you even see what you got in return?”

Emma laughed at the confusion that chased across Regina’s features. “You got a family! Isn’t that what you always wanted? Someone to love you? We’re right in front of you and it’s like we’re invisible. Henry is hurting. I’m hurting too!”

Regina gasped.

Emma released her hold. “I’m going to stay at my parents for a little while until this…hell I don’t know just until.”  Turning away, she swiped at the tears that she could feel coming and left the bathroom surrounded in stunned silence.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Post curse but with none of the convoluted mess of this season. Regina isn't herself and Emma is desperate for a return to normalcy.

Regina poured another glass of scotch. Her hands shook, spilling some of the liquid onto the antique desk that graced her study. She leaned back in the plush leather chair. Right now it and the burn of alcohol were the only things to offer her comfort. Her lips curled downward as beads of the amber liquid dribbled onto her silk blouse, but it was only a fleeting irritation as she swallowed the contents of the glass greedily.

The fire from the liquor momentarily filled the hollowness inside, but after a few seconds profound emptiness remained. This limbo she resided in was a precarious state at best. It was a strange existence being in the in-between. Before when she was just a girl, she had everything, but it was taken from her. Then, she became a powerful woman bent on revenge. Slowly, all the pieces were manipulated into place and she was able to lord over her creation, dictating lives and ensuring her place as their captor…as their queen. Even then, at her most diabolical, all that remained, her vengeance and Henry were wrenched from her hands. Epiphany came then. She was never meant to win. She was never meant to have it all. In the height of childhood innocence, she lost. At the pinnacle of evil, she lost. She tried each end of the spectrum with no success.

At this point, Regina had no idea who to be.

Still trembling hands reached for the liquior decanter again. Instead of filling her glass, the liquor sloshed all over her desk. Regina cursed viciously and threw her empty glass across the room. When it hit the wall, it shattered in spectacular fashion, sending shards flying. Regina’s chest heaved and she brushed away dark locks that fell haphazardly into her face. She stood and moved unsteadily toward the bar.  The room swayed, but somehow she still had the ability to think, to feel, and to ruminate.

People still hated her. This….she was used to.

People still wanted her dead. This…she was used to.

These were the simple things in life.

Still, somehow through the lies and the ruined lives there was someone brave enough to care. Despite others pulling her in the opposite direction, Emma dispelled the countless mobs that threatened to beat down her door. In all her complicated glory, Emma stayed despite her anger and her questions.

Before the bloody strands of the waning curse was broken, the simmering connection between them was finally acknowledged. A truce of sorts was reached because of a common cause…a common concern, Henry. They were the only parents he had after all. Where there had been only yelling, screaming and accusations, there was now civility.  Where there was only baleful glares, there were now heated glances. In her last attempt to maintain the status quo, Regina lashed out in fear. Within a single apple, her destruction was written, and instead of watching on the side lines, hoping for a good show, Emma had been in the thick of it, refusing to be elsewhere.  That alone, had further lightened a damaged heart, and the subsequent confessions and realizations gave it wings.

Regina ambled back toward her desk with a full glass in hand. The contents teetered dangerously with every step. Instead of her usual grace she nearly fell into the chair. She brought the drink to her lips, willing her thoughts away and attempting to banish the past. They crept toward her anyway, reminding her how Emma had steamrolled into her life and cemented herself there somewhere deep.

*

_The click of her heels as Regina headed toward the foyer was cacophonous in such a quiet and empty house as was the banging on her front door. Instantly, she knew this visitor was different than the ones earlier. There was no cursing, screaming, and ‘burn the witch’ had become a common refrain. Still, she paused before she got to the door._

_“Regina!”_

_Something slithered in her belly upon hearing that voice. As if pulled forward by the woman on the other  side, Regina closed the distance. She placed her hand on the cool wood, needing a moment to ground herself._

_“I know you’re in there. Just open the door. Please!”_

_The moment passed, but still her heart raced with anticipation as well as trepidation. She still wrenched the door open, bravado firmly in place even though she no longer felt any of it. “I’m beginning to think, Miss Swan, that you are camping out on my doorstep. There is no need for it. Magic…my magic has returned after all.” Regina’s body crackled as it reminded her of its presence._

_Fair skin flushed red and green eyes widened. ”I—“  Emma shook her head as if to clear it. “Shut up, Regina. Just shut up. If you really wanted to hurt these people, you wouldn’t have let me handle things.” Without preamble, Emma pushed her way inside, brushing past Regina roughly and leaving heat in her wake._

_“Really, dear. Just make yourself at home.”_

_They peered at each other, and Regina did her best to take in every inch._

_“Stop the bullshit. I know you’re not even feeling it anymore. I know you.”_

_Regina’s lips snapped shut and her insides churned because it was indeed the truth._

_Emma’s chest heaved, and her eyes glittered with secrets she was eager to tell. “I should fucking hate you. I didn’t think people like you existed,” she hissed._

_Regina turned away. She knew the monster that she was and could be._

_“Look at me!”_

_Reluctantly, Regina returned her gaze._

_“What does it say about me that I---“  Emma moved forward quickly, bringing with her the smell of leather and the fire of her words. She reached for Regina, grasping her by the elbows and crushing them together. A hard shudder racked Regina’s body._

_“That I feel this?! I don’t want any of this Savior bullshit, and I tried to stop. I did, but you’re all I can think about. This…this is batshit crazy, but it’s happening anyway.”_

_They were close enough to share the same breath. Regina was mesmerized by the intensity between them. The house could have fallen down around them without notice or care._

_Emma’s hands fisted in Regina’s hair, tilting her head upward in one hard jerk. “What does it say about me that I want…this,” Emma whispered._

_As Emma descended, Regina moaned loudly. She could feel the kiss before it happened. She could taste it, and when it actually occurred, everything in her that remained was poured into it. Gasping, she muttered, “I don’t care what it says…just don’t stop.”_

_*_

As Emma situated herself in Regina’s life, she brought with her the return of Henry’s love…the return of his acceptance. Emma had been right. Regina did have everything she ever wanted right in front of her, but she had no idea who to be in order to keep it. With that knowledge, the fight that had so defined her left completely.

**

Regina groaned as lucidity greeted her bit by bit. The first thing she noticed was the pain radiating in her head, back and neck. She lifted her head from the desk and everything around her teetered on its axis, sending an intense wave of nausea to her stomach.

The second thing she noticed was a voice that seemed to echo. Slowly, she moved mussed hair from , her face and peered around through squinted eyes.

“Mom? Mom! Are you alright?”

Recognizing the intrusion, Regina attempted to will herself awake and respondent. A whimper escaped as pain and nausea rolled through her body. “Just give me…a minute, Henry.”

The crunch of glass indicated that he stepped into the room anyway. Regina peered at him through bleary eyes. She could see the shock so plainly written on his countenance.  His nose scrunched in disgust. “Have…have you been drinking? Are you drunk?”

She opened her mouth to speak and refute it because so far she had done extremely well in keeping up appearances where he was concerned. He knew nothing of her struggles. She was appalled that he saw her like this, but before she could utter a word, she was assaulted by a barrage of questions.

“Are you and mom fighting? Is that why she’s at grandma’s? They were fighting too. I snuck out because of it. Why is everyone fighting again?” He paused, and the only thing Regina could hear was the heartbeat in her head.

“Did you…did you do something bad?!” Henry’s tone was accusatory and dripping with disgust.

A pang started deep in her chest. “No, Henry. I didn’t.” Regina husked.

“Then why…what’s going on? I don’t understand?”

Regina tried to stand. If there was one person she needed to pull herself together for even momentarily was her son. “Just—“

“But mom! I—“

Something inside her snapped, ridding her of her remaining energy and tolerance. “I SAID GIVE ME A MOMENT!” Regina screamed. The resulting pain almost made her lose consciousness.

Henry’s eyes widened in what looked to be fear and uncertainty, and he began to back away slowly.

“No, Henry I—“

He shook his head, and after he cleared the study door, he ran.

“Henry—“ Regina stumbled from her desk toward the door. The room swayed with each movement. Unable to find her equilibrium, she fell to the floor.

The front door slammed loudly.

Regina tried to push herself up from the floor, but found herself mired in the broken glass. She chuckled darkly at the apropos metaphor, but a few seconds later, the laughter turned to tears.

*

Emma had her back to the stove while Snow White glared at her from behind the counter.

“I know that woman, Emma. She’s lulling us all into a false sense of security! She has magic. I’m sure she’s just biding her time, and this thing with you is just some twisted game!”

Emma shook her head. “I don’t believe that. I know that’s not what’s happening here, and it doesn’t matter how many ways you say it, I’m never going to believe it!”

A deep sigh came from the vicinity of the table. “Then why are you here? What’s going on with her?” Charming asked.

Emma threw her hands up in surrender. “I don’t know okay! But I do know she’s not hashing some plot. She’s…broken, and I don’t know how to fix it. I know you hate her, but what about me? What about Henry?”

Her parents blinked at her in confusion. “You both have a place here if you want it.”

Emma growled. “Are you that fucking thick headed?! She’s what I want whether you like it or not. She is where we belong!”  She began laughing but it was decidedly without humor. “I guess I just wanted some advice, but I see all the fucks you give.”

“Emma!” Charming stood, clearly outraged.

The front door opened. All of their attention turned toward it. Henry stood wide eyed. “Is mom sick?”

Panic ceased Emma. “What do you mean, kid?”

“I got tired of hearing you guys screaming at each other so I went over there. She was asleep at her desk and drunk. There was…glass everywhere.”

“She’s unbalanced!” Snow exclaimed.

Emma glared. “Don’t you dare! Don’t you dare start this shit in front of my son. He’s heard enough!”

Snow White was blessedly quiet after that point.

Henry began crying. “She…she screamed at me. I don’t know what’s going on. Can someone tell me?”

Emma closed her eyes to will her own tears away. She reached for her son, snaring him in a hug. “Kid, she’s just really sad right now.”

Henry wrestled from her grasp. “So you just left her by herself?!”

Guilt assaulted Emma from every direction. She could barely meet his eyes. “I’ve been trying to help her, but she won’t let me.”

“But, everybody leaves her. It’ll just make her sadder.”

“I have to take care of myself too, kid, and you.” Emma knew it sounded selfish, but it had to be said. “I came here to get advice.”

Henry peered at her stupidly. “From them?!” He pointed at his grandparents.

Emma raised her hands in surrender. “I know it wasn’t the best of ideas.”

“Well, I’m going back. I don’t care how much she yells at me.” Henry paused. “Are you…breaking up with her?” His voice was tiny.

Emma shook her head vehemently despite what she said to Regina the night before. “I haven’t stopped loving her. I just needed some space.”

Their gazes met and held. Emma tried her best to validate his own confusion and anger and hoped he understood her own. Henry stepped away from the group and disappeared through the still open door.

“It may not be the best of ideas for him to stay with that woman.” Charming said.

Emma glared once more at her parents and prayed for strength before stomping up the stairs.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Emma covered her face with her hands. This had become a mess of gigantic proportions, and her ability to fix it seemed to be getting further and further away. When had she given up exactly? When had Regina given up? Emma sighed, remembering the day like it just happened.

**

_As Emma cinched her belt into place, she bent over intent on giving Regina a kiss goodbye. Even though Regina was no longer the Mayor, Emma had retained her mantle as sheriff, feeling like it was needed more than ever._

_“Hey,” Emma whispered. “I’ve got to go. I took care of Henry by the way. He got on the bus with no problems.”_

_Dark eyes peered up at her, and Emma tried to give her some semblance of a smile before closing the distance between them once more._

_Instead of welcoming the caress, Regina turned over and shunned it like she had the more intimate attempts. Emma’s heart dropped. She swallowed and sat down on the bed. “I love you, Regina.” She reached out to grasp her shoulder._

_Regina shrugged her off. “Why? Why bother?”_

_Emma sucked in a shaky breath through constricted lungs. Icy tendrils of fear inched up her spine. “Don’t do this.”_

_“I’m not doing anything.” Regina mumbled._

_“That’s…that’s your defense? I know you’re not doing anything. I have to force you to get out of bed and fake it before Henry gets home. Why are you doing this? What is going on with you? For the millionth time will you please talk to me?”_

_For a few seconds, there was only silence. “That will do nothing to rectify things.”_

_“Neither does this!” Enraged by Regina’s lack of response, Emma grabbed her intent on dragging her from the bed. “Snap out of---“_

_Then, Emma was seeing stars as she slid down the far wall._

_They stared at each other. Brown eyes were dull and lifeless, and Emma knew hers must have denoted her shock, anger and accusation. Emma rubbed the back of her head, feeling for an injury. “I don’t know what to do…anymore.” She murmured brokenly._

_Regina turned over, entombing herself in the comforter and whispering, “Neither do I.”_


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Final story in the Black, White, and Grey series. Post curse but with none of the convoluted mess of this season. Regina isn't herself and Emma is desperate for a return to normalcy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Okay obviously this story is going to be longer than I thought but I have it all planned out in the mess I call my brain so don't worry! There more than likely won't be an update during the work week unless I have a few spare hours but I am going to try. I'm really liking this story its so different and damn should I say realistic? Like they could be some couple on the street. Anyway, I digress. I gave Henry a forgiving part in the story because I think the Henry on the show is an ass (excuse my French). Rumple will be making another appearance later on as well. I hope you found his minute insertion in this chapter interesting. Thanks so much for all the follows and feedback. It gets my blood flowing and the muse to talking so don't be shy!

Emma sat on a bench near the docks and watched the sun rise. She lifted her head slightly letting the first rays of day warm her face because for the past two days she had never felt colder. She had gone from sleeping at her parent’s home to Red’s, but at this point, living in her Bug seemed a better option.

She smiled at a passerby and fellow citizen but only got a scowl in return. It set her nerves on edge, and it was only a fraction of what Regina usually got of that she was sure.  Emma actually smiled knowing Regina relished their fear but their hate…their constant overwhelming hate had to weigh heavily. An uncomfortable ball of emotion began to churn in her stomach as she realized the sheer dislike the citizen’s of Storybrooke had for her at this point based on the company she kept. Emma snorted at the irony since she was the one to save them all in the first place.

This is what it felt like to have no one in her corner.

Lonely and desolate as hell, but it should have been something she was used to. All that changed when she decided to stay in this strange little town. She developed friendships and found the son she was sure to never see again. Then, there was the icing on the cake. She’d found a woman who ripped her open and tunneled inside so deep that she left pieces of herself everywhere. She’d found Regina.

A little voice whispered reminding her that Regina had been in her corner. The little voice screamed that when they were together none of this town’s bullshit mattered, and now she was literally knee deep in it. The rest of her was submerged in regret.

Emma had asked herself at least a million times by now if this was the coward’s way out. So far, there had been no answer. There had been a million more times where all she wanted to do was return home and make things right no matter how long it took or how much she had to give. Then, she remembered that feeling. She was drowning and utterly overwhelmed by something she could not fix. She sucked in a deep breath to fight the prickle of tears behind her eyes.

Seconds later, Emma blinked and pulled on her sun glasses as the sun’s rays became blinding. The momentary warmth provided had faded away as quickly as it came. Emma had a feeling that she would never be warm again.

Hanging her head in supplication for the burden on her shoulders, Emma didn’t see or hear anyone approach her. “Sheriff Swan?”

Emma glanced up in surprise. Someone was talking to her. Rumplestilskin peered at her expectantly. Belle, the woman attached to his arm smiled serenely.

“Gold,” Emma said by way of greeting.

“Ah, let’s dispense with the formalities of this world shall we? Feel free to call me by my real name.”

Emma smirked even though she wasn’t feeling it. “I’ll think about it.”

She peered at him for several seconds. The swarmy smile was the same, but there was a softness in his eyes. He actually looked happy.

“How’s your family?” Rumple asked.

Emma ground her back teeth together to keep from cursing. “They’re doing.”

He tsked. “Not that one. I know they must be insufferable at this point.  Your real one.”

Emma glared, but the softness in his gaze remained. Her heart was squeezed by an unseen force causing Emma to gasp. “We’re…doing.”  Unable to hold his gaze, she looked away.

“Try harder, Sheriff Swan.”

When she looked up again, they were walking away. Emma stood, and asked herself once more if she was being a coward.

**

Regina’s eyes opened in increments. She peered groggily around study and was thankful that she had chosen the sofa to sleep. Slowly, she took stock of her body. Her tongue felt as if it were wearing a hairy coat several times too small. Her limbs were laden, and her head pounded, reminding her that she had sought solace in a bottle once again.

She eased into a sitting position despite her body’s loud protest. The bed…their bed would have been much more comfortable, but Regina couldn’t bring herself to lay in it alone. There were other rooms, but even they held reminders. She glanced bleary eyed at the grandfather clock to see that the hour was later than it needed to be. Henry was going to be late for school.

Henry. At least she had waited until he was asleep to drown herself in liquor. She didn’t want another incident like the days prior. Still, he had returned. It was a shock, and Regina tried to ignore the warmth it garnered because inevitably, she knew she would sabotage it just as she had everything else. However, for him, she would try to show some level of normalcy even though there was none.

Regina stood on wobbly legs and ambled toward the study door. When she opened it, the smell of coffee wafted toward her.  A searing bolt of hope pierced her before it was mired down in the impenetrable dark clouds that covered her. It didn’t keep her from projecting. ”Emma?”

There was only silence.

Regina swallowed ordering herself not to make that mistake again. Demanding her heart to realize that that ship had sailed. It spasmed anyway.  When she pushed open the door to the kitchen, there was a lonely coffee pot filled to the brim. Moving further in, Regina saw that beside it was a couple of slices of raisin toast and a note.

_Mom,_

_I made sure to make a healthy lunch so don’t worry. I made coffee strong like you like it and there is some toast. It will probably be cold when you get up but I just found out that there is a reheat button on the toaster. How cool is that? Never knew anyone would want to reheat toast. Don’t forget to shower today. I love you._

_Henry_

 

The spasm turned into deep throbbing. Regina leaned against the counter for support. It shouldn’t be like this. He should never have to see her in this state. He should never have to take care of her. He deserved…he needed so much more, but Regina knew she didn’t have the strength to give it to him. She hated herself a little bit more because of it.

She bit her lip hard to hold back the tears, but it did nothing to hold back recent memories.

**

_The second time Regina opened her eyes that fateful day she blinked in confusion. She didn’t remember moving to the couch. She glanced around the study. Nor did she remember cleaning up the glass. She groaned as she sat up and then gasped in shock to see the minute wounds from her fall bandaged and Iron Man staring up at her._

_“Good. You’re awake.”_

_Regina did a double take. “H-henry?”_

_“I brought you some coffee. It’s pretty strong. I put a few extra spoonful’s in.” He smiled undoubtedly proud of his own accomplishments._

_“You can’t be here. You can’t see me like this.” Regina pleaded._

_Carrying a tray, he walked further into the room as if she had never spoken. “I know you’re sad, and I’m not leaving. Not again. Okay?” Green eyes held determination. He stood tall and defiant._

_It reminded her so much of his mother that it nearly took Regina’s breath. So, she gave in. “I don’t think this is the best idea, but okay…for now.”_

_His face scrunched. “I love you mom, and I’m not going anywhere…for good.”  Henry didn’t wait for her response. He sat the tray on the desk and handed her a huge cup of coffee. “I only put one sugar in.”_

_“How did you know?”_

_“Mom told me. I help her make the coffee sometimes.”_

_Times when she refused to get out of bed Regina knew. She looked away. ”How…how is she?”_

_“Not good. She’s trying to hide it, but it’s not working.”_

_Regina sat in silence and regret. Emma was the last person she wanted to hurt._

_“Do you think you could eat something?” Henry asked, interrupting her thoughts._

_Regina opened her mouth in warning._

_“Relax, mom. It’s just toast.” He looked at her fondly. “I’m not stupid.” Henry rolled his eyes._

_Regina gave him her best impression of a smile. “Toast would be perfect.”_

_He handed her a saucer with pieces of toast and Regina devoured it as if it were a rare delicacy. She nearly moaned at her first sip of coffee._

_He smiled proudly and asked. “Are you going to stay in here all day? I could help you look for some books to read?  I know when people are sad they sometimes like to be alone. I have a lot of new comics so don’t worry about me.” He sat down on the sofa beside her._

_“I don’t know Henry. I—“_

_“Well, if you need me.” He took the last item from the tray, a walkie talkie. “Just use this.”_

_Regina was actually touched that he would share these with her when before it was something for him and Emma alone.  Her smile was almost genuine this time. “Thank you, Henry.”_

_He nodded. “Oh and mom?” Henry’s nose scrunched up cutely. “Could you maybe take a shower?”_

_Regina almost laughed…almost. “Are you implying—“_

_Henry nodded vigorously. “Yes.”_

_“I don’t think that will be a problem.” Regina assured him._

_“I’ll get your soaps and stuff from upstairs.” He offered and stood._

_Fascinated by him, Regina watched as he walked toward the door. “Henry, I—“_

_“I know, mom. Be right back.”_

_*_

Now back in the present, Regina felt even more bone weary, but despite it, there was an urge to power through. She re heated and finished her toast before ambling toward the downstairs shower.

**

Emma watched for Henry as the school bell rang.  He was in the first group to peel out of the doors. She shook her head at his enthusiasm, knowing where he got it from.  She waved, and her heart clenched as he beamed and ran in her direction.

“Hey, kid---oof!”

He charged at her full speed ending it with an octopus hug. Emma returned it greedily, holding on for dear life. He was most decidedly in her corner.

He pulled back. “You okay?”

Emma nodded. “Why do you ask?”

Henry eyed her knowingly. “Because I can barely breathe.”

She chuckled and reduced her hold. “Sorry about that.”

“It’s okay.” He paused and looked up at her thoughtfully. “Are you taking me home because I really don’t want to go back to Grandma’s.”  His eyes were pleading. “I don’t like them very much right now. Plus, I promised mom that I’d stay with her.”

Laughter exploded from Emma. He was definitely her kid because she didn’t like them much right now either. “No, I’ll take you to our house unless you want to stop at Granny’s for a milkshake?”

He shook his head. “No, I want to check on mom.”

Emma swallowed. “Yeah.” She did too, but she was in no way ready.

Silence lapsed between them as they got into the police cruiser.

“You said our house.” Henry muttered.

“I did.”

“But you’re not living there.”

“My stuff is.” So was her heart.

Henry stared at her as she pulled from the curve. “She misses you. She won’t say, but I can tell. Just like I can tell that you miss her too.”

“I do miss her.” Emma whispered.

“How come I didn’t know how sad she was until now?”

“Because your mom is very good at hiding things when she wants to. We both did a good job of it as long as we could.”  Emma took the statement to heart because she was sure that Regina was hiding her feelings awhile before it came to light even for her.  “How is she?”

Henry was silent.

“That bad?” Emma gasped.

“I got her to eat and take a shower.”

Emma sighed. “Henry, you shouldn’t be the one—“

“No, I know that. It should be you.”

There was total silence.

Out of the mouths of babes.

When she pulled up to the mansion, Henry hopped out but not before saying good bye and stating his love. Emma sat there with the engine running idle, hoping to get a peak.

The door opened and Henry barreled into his other mother just like he did her.  A pained look crossed Regina’s face, and there was an obvious reluctance to return the affection. In the end, Regina did. Henry disappeared into the foyer, but Regina remained in the door way.

Emma’s gaze ate her hungrily. She was gaunt, pale, but still the most beautiful woman she had ever seen. It took everything Emma had in her not to run toward Regina, wrap around her and tell her everything wasn’t going to be fine. It hadn’t worked before, and Emma was highly suspicious about it working now. Regina had to take the steps to accept the help offered. So instead, Emma waved.

Regina leaned against the door jab and stared. Their eyes met and their connection simmered underneath. Regina didn’t turn away, and she didn’t hide. It wasn’t much, but it was something.  That…Emma would take. Slowly, she pulled out of the driveway.

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Final story in the Black, White, and Grey series. Post curse but with none of the convoluted mess of this season. Regina isn't herself and Emma is desperate for a return to normalcy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Well...apparently I am a liar and now I am officially addicted and excited about this story! Is anybody else huh? HUH? LOL, so here is a new chapter. I guess I'll be posting when I have the time and it comes to me which appears to be in my sleep. These two can be so disruptive! Enjoy.

Regina peered down into her cup of coffee. The blackness swirled. It was almost hypnotizing, but she knew it was only an attempt to avoid the issue at hand.  Henry sat across from her at the table, scarfing down a bowl of sugary cereal.  It was decidedly strange being in this situation without having to hide from him the black hole she had been sucked into. 

Two days without alcohol had left her more coherent.  Without its rancor to dull her senses, she felt the sharp pull of constricting pain in her chest, making it hard to breathe normally, and the proverbial weight on her shoulders was crushing, leaving it impossible to maintain her usual perfect posture. Then, there was the stark reminder that Emma was no longer gracing her with her presence. The house wasn’t the same without her. She was the one who made it a home. There hadn’t even been a phone call which made her latch on to the afternoon sightings all the more.

She could also feel Henry’s gaze as it trickled back and forth.  “It’s okay, Henry. I won’t bite.”

He sighed. “I know that. It’s just…good to see you up. Does it feel good to be up?”

Regina did not want to lie to him, but the truth was regardless of it all, she felt almost human. Still, there was a mélange of emotions so alien tumbling inside her that she wondered if the almost would diminish or progress in time. “It feels…I’m not sure how it feels, but I do apologize for exposing you to this.”

Henry shrugged. “You were The Evil Queen, mom.”

She glanced at him sharply. “Are you saying this pales in comparison to the stories you’ve read?”

He shrugged again. “I’m saying that it doesn’t matter who you are. You’re my mom.”  Henry looked down into his bowl before glancing up again. “I know I said it before, but I’m sorry for the way I acted before and after the curse.”

Regina ignored the apology. It was water under the bridge. “I don’t blame you for the way you behaved. You were entitled.” It was his statement before that caught her attention. She let it seep into her. It was easy for him to utter those words. He wasn’t present during the height of her power. To read about it was one thing, but to experience it was entirely another. Still, he only knew a fraction of her indiscretions in Storybrooke. But, his words had been earnest as was his expression.  She wanted to believe. She wanted desperately to believe.

“The curse had to end though. It’s been better for everybody.”

She nodded her head in agreement. For a moment, she selfishly gleaned to the idea that no it had not been better for everybody, especially her. Then, she looked past it.  She had her son back just as intelligent and giving as ever, and then there was Emma. She had Emma. _Had._   Regina knew she hadn’t  even allowed herself to morn that loss as of yet.  When it came down to it, being in this limbo certainly wasn’t the answer, it was part of the problem. That much she could acknowledge, but Regina still had no idea where to go from here.

Henry jumped up from the table with bowl in hand. “Do you want me to refresh your coffee before I go?”

“No, it’s okay. I think I’m sufficiently motivated to possibly do that this morning.”

Henry’s smile was illustrious. “Don’t forget to---“

“Shower. I know. You’re going to be late if you don’t leave immediately.”

Green eyes so like his mother’s twinkled with affection. He ran toward the kitchen and a few seconds later he returned, wrapping her in a side hug. His face burrowed into the crook of her neck, and he felt more than ever like her little boy. When he pulled away, she realized that he was fast becoming a man.  It was hard for her to muster a smile, but she hoped he could somehow read it in her countenance.

“Later, mom.”

A few seconds later the front door slammed.

The silence was deafening, and Regina found that she missed the laughter Emma brought into the home with her absurd and sometimes infantile ways.  She always found it entertaining whether she admitted it or not.

As Regina stood and ambled toward the kitchen, she acknowledged that she missed the way Emma looked and spoke to her the most of all.

**

_With a slight huff, Regina sat the bowl of popcorn down on the table and took her place at Emma’s side. “I can’t believe that I invested in this infernal contraption.”_

_Emma grunted then grinned as she maneuvered the controller. “It was for Henry.”_

_“It was for you. Your enjoyment is obvious. What is this game called again?”_

_“Dragon Age Origins.”_

_“Mmm.” Regina glanced at the TV screen. Her eyes widened. “Are they—“_

_“Yesss, they are.”_

_Astonished, Regina leaned forward. “They allow lesbian pairings in---“_

_“Uh huh, isn’t it great?”_

_“It’s…interesting.” Regina nearly exited her skin in surprise at the feel of fingertips trailing up her arm._

_“Not nearly as interesting as that.”_

_“What do you mean?” Regina gasped as a warm hand snaked around her neck to wind into her hair. The touch was scorching, leaving her breathless._

_“Your reaction to me.”_

_Strange shadows covered part of Emma’s face, but her eyes were illuminated and fathomless in their intensity._

_It was all for Regina._

_At this moment, she felt as if she were the most important thing in their world. It was a feeling she relished…a feeling she needed now more than ever. “Emma,” Regina husked._

_The hand in her hair tightened and pulled, exposing Regina’s throat. “You have no idea do you? How beautiful you are. How perfect…you are.” Emma whispered hotly._

_Regina knew she was aesthetically pleasing, and in the past, she had used it maliciously. To be wanted like this; looked upon like this was a new experience, and Emma was the catalyst. As lips descended and Emma’s searing mouth scored her throat, Regina knew that to this woman she was a goddess._

_*_

Regina emptied her coffee cup and filled it again with trembling hands, and she wondered why Emma’s strength and her love were not enough to keep her spiraling downward. Because right now, she wished that she felt beautiful, perfect and tantamount to a goddess both inside and out.

**

_Emma slicked her hair back as the hot water trickled over her face and down her body. She groaned into wakefulness and tilted her head upward into the spray so it could finish the job. The night had been long and confusing, and she took this time to find her bearings._

_She sighed into the steam as she tried to analyze last night events. For the first time since they had been seeing each other, Regina had rebuffed her sexually. It wasn’t just that. It was how she did it that bothered Emma. Regina had been warm, soft and pliant, but there was something cold and empty about her as well._

_Cool air rushed toward her, and she felt Regina before she actually saw her. Hands snaked around her torso, and Emma’s eyes closed at the feel of it. “Hey.”_

_A wet kiss to her shoulder was her only response._

_“Did Henry get out of here okay?”_

_Regina nodded. Emma could feel the gesture against her back._

_“Emma…I apologize for last night. I was preoccupied.”_

_Emma sighed. Even not facing her, she could tell Regina was lying. “You’ll tell me what it was really about later?”_

_Her answer was a tongue sweeping over the sensitive skin at the nape of her neck. Regina’s slick hands trailed over Emma’s stomach then inched slowly toward her breasts, leaving prickly trails of fire in their wake. Regina stepped closer, and Emma moaned as the sharp points of Regina’s nipples scored the skin of her back._

_Teeth nipped at her shoulder as fingertips circled the turgid tips of her breasts before giving them a hard tug. “Let me make it up to you.”_

_In the back of her mind, Emma knew it was subterfuge, but she turned anyway, drawing them into a kiss that was hotter, slicker than the water around them._

_**_

Emma awakened gasping. She pushed sweaty tendrils away from her face and peered around the room in confusion. Granny’s. She was at Granny’s.  She swallowed to lubricate her dry throat, and shifting in the bed, she nearly chuckled as she realized where all the liquid in her body was pooling. It had indeed been a long dry spell, and it had been even longer since she thought of Regina in that light. There was still an overwhelming attraction between them and a compulsion to get closer when they were in the same room, but with the depressive quagmire they had found themselves in, Emma had to admit that the later took precedent.

Rolling over to the other side of the bed, Emma wished that she could at least smell her in the sheets or on the pillow. Regina’s perfume, her scent had always been haunting. Closing her eyes, she recognized that she hated the silence of no one breathing or shifting beside her.  It was odd really having been such a loner for such a long period of time. Now, her body and mind was attuned to Regina, and she couldn’t even fathom touching anyone else.

Regina.

Henry was right. She had abandoned her, but Emma had come to the conclusion that it was a necessary evil. They needed to gain some perspective, and she was sure there was no way they could do it together.  Emma sighed, but how could they gain perspective if they weren’t even communicating?  The sound of Regina’s voice was just as haunting as her scent, and Emma missed it viciously.

Without thought, without a plan, she reached for the phone on the bedside table and dialed numbers that she knew a hundred times over.

Each time it rang, Emma’s heart thudded all the faster.

“Hello?”

Emma squeezed her eyes shut and willed the tears not to come.

There was complete silence.

“Emma?”  Regina’s voice sounded so small…so wounded.

“Hey.”

There was a shuddering breath on the other end. “Oh, God.”

The tears that Emma was fighting began to fall anyway. She sniffled. “How did you know it was me?”

“Who in this town would have the audacity?”

“I have plenty of audacity to spread around.”

A choked chuckle was her response.

Emma took the phone away from her ear and peered at it. “Did you just…laugh?”

“I-I think so.”

“I haven’t heard that in a while.”

“I suppose it is product of missing you.” Regina whispered.

“I miss you too,” Emma confessed.

“I’m trying to understand. Help me to understand why you left then?”

Emma released a calming breath, hoping it would get her thumping heart under control and ease the clenching in her belly. “I love you, but you know why. I was drowning with you.”

There was silence, and Emma wondered if Regina was going to admit it.

“Yes, I could see that. I didn’t have it in me to stop it,” Regina sobbed.

“I know.”

“Then, how can you trust me with Henry?”

“Because he’s Henry, and I’m starting to think he has more strength and sense than the both of us.”

Regina made another sound of amusement even through her tears. “Yes, that’s entirely possible.”

Emma was somehow weakened and strengthened by this conversation simultaneously. “Regina?”

“Yes?”

“It’s…not enough to just see you in the doorway every day. Can I call you?”

“Please.” 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the last story in a series starting with Black, White, and now ending with Grey. Post curse but with none of the convoluted mess of this season. Regina isn't herself and Emma is desperate for a return to normalcy.

**A/N: Sigh...here I am again, but I think this is it for the week so far. All mistakes are mine btw. Hope you enjoy. I think we are really making some progress.**

* * *

In the dim light, Emma squinted at the ceiling following the textures and swirls as if she were trying to find something interesting at the end. Turning, she glanced at the clock on the nightstand. It glared at her angrily in red. It was 1:03 a.m., and sleep was elusive.

_Try harder, Miss Swan._

Emma snorted at the fact that Rumplestiltskin had been right. She was generally wary of anything that man had to say, but he had been quiet since the curse ended. There had been no grand scheme to come of it. Yet.

Still.

He had been right. She left to gain perspective, but had coasted along for a few days waiting for something to happen instead of making it so. Emma wanted her family back more than anything…more than she wanted a mother…a father. Somewhere in the back of her mind and tucked deep into her heart, she had been hoping that some strange happenstance would bring them together. The reality was that she had survived without them. There were scars and old wounds on her psyche, but she was still standing.

Emma had been a runner that much was true, but when Emma set her sights on something that she wanted she ran toward it just as hard. Her family. It was the gold at the end of the rainbow, and she wanted the laughter, the passion, the arguments, and all the other bumps in the road that got in the way.

This was an enormous bump, but in time, she hoped to have the laughter and everything else back.

* * *

_Emma was sure that Regina had the softest skin she had ever felt. She watched her pale hand trace over Regina torso, marveling at the irony of light and dark._

_"Miss Swan. I think you're a little too old to play hide and seek."_

_Poking her head from under the covers, Emma muttered, "Just making some observations."_

_"Mmm, Henry will be up soon so let us make sure your observations don't lead you to take action."_

_Emma peered into dark eyes, and they were the softest that she had ever seen them. "It's your fault. You shouldn't look like you do…feel like you do."_

_An imperial brow rose, but a grin quirked full lips, still kiss swollen from previous intimacies. "I'll take that under advisement." Regina paused and her eyes twinkled with affection. "Thank you for bringing him over. He appeared to have a good time."_

_"He did. I think he was surprised by that too. Who knew you could let loose and make a fool of yourself. It was fun to see you like that. Just Dance is obviously your game."_

_"I am unfamiliar with today's style of dance. I did my best," Regina added irritably._

_"And I loved every minute of it. Now, shut up. I was busy."_

_Regina made a sound that was half amusement and half resignation._

_With a wink, Emma pulled the covers back over her head and commenced her journey. She heard a gasp as curious fingers teased Regina's left side. Barely a second later, Emma felt a smack near the vicinity of her head._

_"Stop it!" Regina commanded breathlessly._

_Jerking the covers away, Emma smiled at her discovery. "What have we here?" She repeated the caress._

_"Emma!" Regina's eyes held a warning, but there was definitely a dare in there somewhere as well. A grin tugged at Regina's lips, and they trembled in her efforts to hide it._

_Being the person she was, Emma did it again._

_Regina bellowed with laughter, filling the room with it. It made Emma's breath catch at the wonder of it, and she had caused it._

_"Emma!" Regina howled, then muttered brokenly, "H-henry."_

_As if saying his name conjured him, Henry burst through the door. "What was that? I h—" He squawked. "What are you doing?! And why are you naked?!" He turned around almost immediately. "Never mind!"_

_Emma did what she thought was best, and hid under the covers once more._

* * *

Shaking her head, Emma chuckled at the memory. There had been many good times, and Emma let them guide her once more.

She picked up the phone.

Within a few rings, Regina answered her cell. "Couldn't sleep?" She asked, sounding wide awake herself.

"You either?"

"No. Which is odd, since I had been getting a bevy of it over the past few weeks." Regina answered

"Maybe you're turning a corner."

"Possibly."

Emma groaned and shifted around in her effort to get more comfortable. "I miss our bed."

"So do I," Regina whispered in return.

Emma swallowed. For some reason, the admission made her heart hurt and smile at the same time. "You haven't-"

"No, I can't. It didn't feel right."

"But this does. I like talking to you like this. We haven't done it for a long time. It feels like we've spent at least ten hours on the phone the last couple of days."

"I've looked forward to it as well." Regina paused. "It doesn't even bother me that there isn't a schedule concerning it." She almost sounded teasing.

Emma laughed out loud. "Hey, I'm a fly by the seat of your pants kind of girl. I knew I would rub off on you sooner or later."

"Indeed."

Still chuckling, Emma asked, "Remember the time I got you to play along with the dance game?"

Regina sighed, but Emma knew it was faux exasperation. "I do."

"I was just thinking about it. I miss that, and I want it back Regina. I know I'm not there, but I'm here." Emma paused, suddenly flustered. "Did that come out right? Do you know—"

"I know what you meant. I want it too." Regina said softly.

"Good because I'm not going anywhere, but this is kind of up to you…I think."

For a few seconds, there was silence.

"I'm trying…at least I think that I am."

"Good, I am too." Emma huffed. Damn that Rumplestiltskin.

"Emma?"

"Yeah?"

"I have a full charge on my phone. Would you like to bring the number to sixteen?"

Emma snorted. "That's my favorite number anyway."

* * *

_The marketplace was a bustle of activity. Regina ambled from stall to stall as her mother conducted her business. She stopped at one that had the most interesting baubles and waited her turn to haggle. Regina scanned her surroundings, and the people around her until someone caught her eye._

_She watched in fascination as a young couple breezed through holding hands. The way they studied each other gave her pause as did their inability to stop touching. The woman' cheeks were flushed pink and the smile on her face large enough to get lost in._

_"What do you see when you look at them?"_

_Regina was startled to hear and suddenly feel her mother so close. "They appear to be extremely happy." She paused for a few seconds then continued. "I wish to be like that someday."_

_Cora Mills chuckled darkly. "That…my dear is fleeting. It fades with a good strong wind. There is something better. Shall I show you?"_

_Regina glanced at her mother for several still seconds. There was something in her tone that made Regina slow to answer._

_"Well?" Cora asked expectantly._

_Regina nodded._

_"Use your words child."_

_"Yes mother."_

_Cora's return smile was everything but merry._

_"Very well." Cora raised her hand to fiddle with perfectly coiffed hair._

_Regina gasped and stumbled. "Mother! I can't see!" She heard startled voices all around her. "Mother!"_

_"Please! Do not be alarmed. This is a daily affliction for my daughter. It will pass!" Cora announced to the crowd._

_Regina's elbow was grabbed roughly, painfully. "So tell me, who holds the power here? The young woman lost in the dark or the one who can return her to the light?" Cora whispered harshly._

_"I said nothing of power."_

_"No, you spoke of happiness. I spoke of an alternative. Whom do you think is happier at this moment? You or I?" Cora asked gleefully._

_"You…are." Regina answered reluctantly._

_"Mmm, and why is that?"_

_"Because you hold the power," Regina murmured lowly._

_"Speak louder child."_

_"Because you hold the power," she repeated._

_"You should see them gawking at you as if you are the village idiot. They do not respect you. They pity you as if you are one of them. You are my daughter, and you will be looked upon properly…with fear."_

_Then, Regina could see again. She willed the trembling to stop and glanced at the crowd to see a myriad of eyes on her. Some patrons whispered behind raised hands while others looked on shaking their heads. Regina felt the red blush of embarrassment as well as a spark of anger at their audacity._

_"This was the first lesson of many. Remember it well."_

_"Yes, mother."_

* * *

Regina was awakened from her slumber by the sound of her own whimper. She sat up quickly and looked around in utter confusion of where and when she was. It was followed immediately by burning rage. Magic sparked at her fingertips as a direct result. Her chest heaved as she gulped in air in an attempt to calm down. After several seconds, the feat was achieved, but a residual anger and familiarity was left simmering.

Cora Mills and her infernal lessons had not been in her thoughts for some time.

Hate bristled, and Regina realized that it was one of the strongest emotions she'd had for some time in addition of the depressive malaise. Hate was the cornerstone of who she had become…of who she was. It had been a motivator to plot, scheme to dispense vengeance, but as Regina rose to peer at the clock striking just noon, it became a different kind of motivator all together.

The overall idleness she was trapped in felt wrong, and Regina knew it was getting her nowhere. She recalled Henry's hopeful but wary expression every time he glanced at her. He was afraid for her as she was for herself.

Fear was an expression she had become accustomed to in many faces, but not in her son's nor in her own. As she entered the bathroom and stared into the mirror, the face of fear peered back at her.

Regina wanted none of it.

Cora Mills and her infernal lessons had been a great motivator, but Regina knew she would turn over in her grave if she knew what it sparked in her daughter on this day.

Regina stared at her reflection. Her cheeks were gaunt, hollow, and her eyes sunken.

She closed said eyes and thought of Emma. She thought of her family.

Yes, this idleness felt wrong, and for the first time in a while, Regina felt a nearly uncontrollable urge to do something to rectify it.

* * *

Regina materialized outside her father's crypt. She could have ended her journey inside, but she felt the need to enter under her own steam. Regina waited for the long purple tendrils of residual magic to dissipate before moving forward. It gave her a moment to breathe and collect herself. The sudden ringing of her cell phone startled her, but irritated her as well. The momentum was in her favor, and Regina knew that if she lost it, the momentary reprieve from the darkness would be over.

It took her a second to realize it was a ring she should have been more than familiar with. Without pause, Regina accepted the call. "Emma?" She asked breathlessly.

"Hey, I-" Emma went silent before asking, "Are you okay?" There was another pause. "That was a stupid question. I'm sorry."

"No, it's warranted I suppose."

"You're not…busy are you?" A second later, Emma chuckled. "I just keep putting my foot right in it. Way to go Swan."

Regina found her awkwardness endearing just as she always had even more so after the previous night. It offered her encouragement to be honest. "I'm in the cemetery actually."

"The crypt? Why would you be there?"

"It just felt like the right place to be. You could say I was pulled here."

"Do you want some company?"

Regina was shocked by the request, but then she remembered that Emma would lend a hand and try to fix everyone if she could. Regina, however, knew she was not one of those individuals.

"Too soon? After last night, I felt closer to you than I have in a while." Emma spoke into the silence.

After what seemed like hours of phone calls over the past couple of days, Regina wanted nothing more than to see Emma in the living, breathing flesh up close and personal. "No…never. I feel as if I should do this alone."

"There is a hell of a lot of your past in there."

"There is." Regina agreed, but she also knew that was the point.

"You know where I am if you need me."

"I do," Regina murmured softly.

* * *

Less than a minute later, she was in the bowels of the crypt. It was bursting with power from every corner, contained within every heart, but Cora had been so wrong. Power was no alternative to true happiness. It was simply a band aid to cover the wounds that her mother had inflicted as well as the gaping hole Daniel had left.

She moved toward the columns of boxes. With a wave of her hand, she pulled each box from their home, sensing and cataloging. Memories assailed her. She recalled taking every heart and the malicious glee it garnered.

Was there anger still surging within her? Regina knew that there was underneath the mess she had become. There was also hate woven into the very strands of who she was, but now, there was also a strong pang of regret. That pang ensured that she would never be The Evil Queen again. Part of her mourned that death because it had been so much of her life.

"Regina."

Regina gasped and turned. So invested in the issue at hand, she heard no one enter. Emma peered at her from a few feet away.

"How did you-"

"You left the door unlocked. I guess you were really preoccupied." Green eyes were laser like in their scrutiny. "That's a lot of hearts."

"It is." Regina closed her eyes and her own heart lurched in disappointment then throbbed with wisps of anger. "Why are you here, Emma?"

The silence around them was thick.

"I felt—"

"You don't trust me," Regina muttered softly, significantly.

Emma shook her head vehemently and took a few steps forward. "I do. I'm not my mother, but I don't know who you are. Despite our talks and how much I love you, I don't know who you are."

"Neither do I." Regina added with resignation.

Emma's eyes cleared. Her mouth opened and closed several times before any sound emanated from it. "That's it isn't it?"

Regina swallowed and turned to her former treasures. For some reason, she didn't want to utter the words a loud. "I would like to return them all as soon as I'm able. I need to find a way."

"Regina," Emma whispered softly.

Emma was much closer than before. Regina could feel her heat. She whimpered as strong arms snaked around her. They burned her with a welcome fire. It seemed like a millennium since she felt it. Emma's touch had been the catalyst to return her magic, but memories of her mother's cruelty had been the strange but needed ingredient in this one. Finally, Regina was able…ready to answer Emma's question.

"Yes."

* * *

**That box is still down there...waiting for you to put something in it...yeah?**


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the last story in a series starting with Black, White, and now ending with Grey. Post curse but with none of the convoluted mess of this season. Regina isn't herself and Emma is desperate for a return to normalcy.

**A/N: Sooo, hello? Anyone out there? Okay well this chapter is longer than the others. I wanted to move the story along but make things a natural progression as well. There is still underlying angst but it has some lighter bits and some sexy times (in retrospect). Gotta love those flash backs.**

* * *

 

The loud knocking startled Emma to wakefulness.  She sat up and blinked rapidly trying to rid herself of the fog of deep sleep. The last couple of nights had been the best slumber she had in weeks.

The incessant knocking started again. “Emma!” A familiar voice whispered harshly.

“Aw fuck.”  Things had been going better why not throw a monkey wrench in the works.

“I know you’re in there.”

Emma scowled. She was most certainly not up to this. “Coming! Keep your panties on!” She looked down at herself as she stumbled out of bed, making sure she at least looked presentable and not naked. Emma pushed tangled strands of hair from her face and ambled toward the door.

She yanked it open, and Snow White nearly fell into the room. She pulled down on her cardigan as she gained her footing.

Through bleary eyes, Emma peered at her warily. “Yes?” She practically hissed. “I was hoping to sleep in this morning.”

“I hope for a lot of things that are obviously not going to happen.” Snow gave as good as she got.

Emma sighed. “Can we get to the point of this visit? I have not been sleeping well, but that bed was being pretty nice to me the past couple of days.”

Her mother eyed her critically. “This can’t be too comfortable for you. Come home with me.”

Snorting, Emma shook her head in disbelief, “Neither is my parent’s house.”

“I’m willing to forget all of this ever happened if you are.”

“And Regina?”

“She’s one of the things I want to forget.” Snow answered.

Emma released a sudden bark of laughter. “You really are a piece of work, and I’m saying this with love. I liked Mary Margaret a hell of a lot better because there wasn’t a sanctimonious bone in her body!”

Snow White gasped. “Emma! I’m your mother!”

“Snow! I am an adult! Deal with it! I’m not sixteen bringing home the bad boy. You can’t keep me from seeing who I want. I’m tired of repeating myself.”

“I just want what’s—“

“No, you don’t. Not in this case. Come off it. It’s Regina.”

Snow’s mouth snapped shut. Her eyes closed and she appeared to be breathing deeply. When she spoke again her tone was calm. “I know her, Emma.”

“No. You. Don’t.” Emma pointed at her mother accusingly.  “Do you really think saying the same thing to me over and over again is going to change anything? It’s the definition of insanity.” 

“If you knew what she was capable of---“

Emma rolled her eyes in exasperation. “I know what Regina was capable of I read the god damned book, and you know what? Two days ago the both of us stood in her crypt surrounded by hearts. She could have crushed every single one, and almost everyone in this town would be dead, Do you know why she was there?”

“Reliving the past…her greatest triumphs—“

“Will you just please stop! Insanity remember? No, she wants to find a way to put them all back.”

Snow shook her head not even allowing the words to sink in. “There is no redeeming that woman no matter who she sleeps with.”

“Red is a murderer. Everyone in this town has done some fucked up shit including you. What makes them…you still good, huh?!”  Emma’s anger began to boil.

“Some of us did what we had to do!” Snow’s face was blotchy red and hot with emotion.

“So did she. She was molded, pushed and prodded to become exactly what she was just like you were. You were born to be the princess, and she was born to be The Evil Queen. You both played your parts perfectly.”

Snow’s eyes were wide and filled with confusion as well as hurt. “W-what did you say?”

Emma wiped a hand over her face, and answered softly, “You heard me.”

Snow stumbled toward a nearby chair.

Silence encased them.

Emma walked slowly toward her mother who peered up at her through unseeing eyes. “Look, I’m not trying to make you into Regina’s biggest fan or anything. I’m not trying to force anything on you, and you guys need to show me the same courtesy.”

Tears fell from Snow White’s eyes.

Emma kneeled down until they were at eye level. “Things are not black and white at least not anymore. We’re all grey every single one of us… even Regina.”

Snow White looked down in her lap as if gathering herself. “I think I need time to digest everything you’ve said, but you…you really do love her don’t you?” She asked quietly.

“Yeah, I do.” Emma nodded and smiled.

“No matter what I—“

“No matter what you or anybody says.” Emma interrupted.

“How?”

“She understands me, and I’m starting to understand her again.”

“But she made you who you are…she—“  Snow muttered.

“Yeah, I know. I turned out pretty good I have to say, and I’m even better when I’m with her.”

“Emma—“

“You’re my mother, and for once in my life I want everything normal people get to have. That includes you, James, Henry, and Regina, but…”  Emma paused. “Accept me for who I am, or don’t---“

“Accept you at all?”

“Yeah. So, it’s either going to be pretty good between us or shitty, but I guess a relationship is a relationship right?”

Snow wiped her eyes. “I don’t want a shitty one.”

Knowing that she needed to defuse the situation, Emma did what she did best. Her eyes widened in mock horror. “Did…did you just…my God Snow White just said a curse word!”

Snow chuckled and punched at Emma’s shoulder. “I know what you’re doing.”

“Doesn’t matter it worked anyway. Go on. Say it again. Might as well drop an f-bomb too. I won’t tell.”

Snow gave her a watery smile.

“You might feel better. Hell, I know I do when I drop it.”

Her mother laughed out right. “Stop it,” she sniffled.

Emma patted Snow’s knee and grinned slyly.

Snow reached forward tracing Emma’s features with trembling fingers. “You’re so much like your father. He’s one of the only people who could make me laugh.”  She sighed. “I’ll try, Emma. I’m not promising anything, but I’ll try.”

 

SQSQSQSQ

Groaning, Emma crawled back into bed in hopes of retrieving much need sleep. She flopped around on the pillows and turned right to left. The blinking of her cell phone caught her eye. Emma flipped it open and her heart quivered in her chest. It was a text from Regina.

_Good morning, Miss Swan._

Emma grinned wide enough to split her cheeks.

_Hey._

A few seconds later, her phone vibrated again.

_Sleeping in?_

_I was trying until my mother banged on the door._

_I’m sure she was singing my praises. ;)._ Regina wrote.

_LOL well she was singing alrite, but I think maybe her tune will change soon._

_Have you turned into an eternal optimist?_ Regina asked.

_Nah, I just know things about people. Like I know right now I’d rather hear your voice._

Emma’s phone vibrated once more, and she didn’t hesitate to answer.

“Is that better?” Regina asked not bothering to wait to be greeted.

“Immensely.”

“I thought this texting nonsense was the ‘in’ thing to do.” Regina said.

“Not when you have a voice like yours.”

Regina huffed, but it sounded more like a chuckle. “ _Mm_ m.”

“Uh huh.”

“Don’t let me keep you from your slumber.”

“You’re won’t. In fact, you can help.”

“How’s that?”

“Do you have a phone book handy? Or maybe the newspaper? Hell, I’ll take the dictionary if you’re reading it.” Emma waited.

“Must you be so strange and insufferable?” Regina’s voice was dripping with amusement.

Emma got exactly what she wanted. “Yes…yes I must.”

“Good because you can be very amusing at times.”

“You don’t say.” Emma could almost hear the eye roll as she yawned. There was something she needed to say before sleep took her. “Regina?”

“Yes?”

“Whoever you are or whoever you’re becoming, I’m going to love you anyway.”

Regina was quiet for several seconds. “You do that on purpose don’t you?”

“Do what?” Emma yawned again.

“Rip me open so you can dig deeper.”

“No, I didn’t do it on purpose. I guess I just know you.”

“You’ve been the only one capable of that. It irritated me to no end at the beginning, and it still irritates me now. I think it’s just the nature of us,” Regina added.

“I agree.”

“Get some sleep, Emma,” Regina said quietly.

“Okay, but expect a text later.”

“I prefer hearing your voice too.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”  As Emma hit the end button on her phone, she realized that Regina never addressed her statement. She shook her head in wonder, but she knew she would get a response one way or another.  The combination of seeing her mother and talking with Regina stirred up some interesting memories, and Emma let them come.

 

SQSQSQ

_Emma was surprised when Henry answered the door. She raised a brow at him as she entered the foyer. “What’s up, kid?”_

_“Mom’s cooking. She told me my job was to host.”_

_“Is that right?”_

_“Yep!” Henry beamed._

_“Well then host away.”_

_Henry grabbed her hand and led her to the couch. He was positively vibrating. “Isn’t it great that my mom invited you for dinner?”  He leaned in to whisper. “Just keep in mind that she’s evil. You can use this time to study her.”_

_Emma sighed and said in exasperation. “Kid, can’t we have a curse free night? I need a truce on this topic.”_

_“Like you did with mom?”_

_“Yeah, like that.”_

_His shoulders sagged, and he pouted. It was adorable. “I guess.”_

_Emma mussed his hair in thanks. “So what are we having?” She peered at the tray on the table in front of them._

_Henry’s face scrunched. “Some weird tasting cheese. That mango stuff is good though.” He pointed in the middle of the tray._

_Chuckling, Emma murmured. “Okay, I’m going to try it anyway. I’m starving.”_

_“Mom’s making lasagna.”_

_Emma plopped a cheese covered cracker in her mouth. It did taste weird. “It’s good?”_

_“Best I’ve ever had.”_

_Emma grinned. “It’s good to hear you say something nice about her for a change.”_

_He shrugged sheepishly. “It’s the truth. Billy’s mom’s lasagna is all mushy.”_

_“Mmm.” Emma scooped some of the mango stuff on top of the cheese. “Mmm, you were right but I think the mango stuff goes on top of the cheese. It makes everything better.”  Feeling more comfortable, Emma took off her red leather jacket and threw it over the back of the couch._

_Several minutes passed, and Emma had heard all about Henry’s favorite video game. He was now moving on to his favorite comic book. She loved the Kid, but was dying for some adult conversation.  Emma peered discreetly toward the kitchen door. She could hear the shuffling around, but wanted more._

_Emma’s stomach clenched at the thought of seeing the Mayor in all her bitchy glory. She had never met anyone who could push her buttons so hard and so quickly. Emma felt more alive than she had in years because of it. She wasn’t blind. Something happened between them when they argued. There was always an electricity in the air that seemed to push them closer and closer to each other with each word and hurled insult. When they weren’t arguing, there was still a charge around them. Emma could almost taste it, and it was delicious. “I’m going to make sure you’re mom doesn’t need any help. Be right back, kid.”_

_Henry glared irritably but nodded nonetheless._

_A few seconds later, she pushed open the kitchen door. Regina peered over her shoulder but didn’t turn. “You invite me over, but don’t even bother to make an appearance. You seemed like you had more manners than that Regina.”_

_Regina turned then, removing oven mitts.  Her answering smirk was dangerous. “I have a bevy of manners, Miss Swan. Otherwise, I would have done many a nasty thing to you long ago.”_

_Emma was careful not to utter a word as she took in the woman before her: perfectly coiffed shimmering dark hair, eyes deep enough to fall into, lips so red that they had to be tasted, and it was all wrapped in a tight little package, punctuated by a pencil skirt with a shirt that looked softer than her skin. “Is that right?” Before Emma knew it, she was moving forward._

_Regina’s head tilted to the side as if she were contemplating, but the twinkle in her eye looked as though she were plotting. “It is,” she husked._

_Slowing her progress, Emma squinted as she attempted to decipher the woman before her. “What goes on in that head of yours?”_

_Regina’s smile was full, wide._

_It was enough to cause heart palpitations, but the laugh that accompanied it nearly made her stomach tie in knots._

_“I like this truce if it’s going to make you say such interesting things.”_

_Emma walked forward once more as if pulled. When she got closer, Regina turned. “Dinner should be ready momentarily. Be a dear and remove the bread and lasagna from the oven, while I finish everything else.” Regina reached up toward the cabinet._

_Emma blinked and looked away from the Mayor’s taut form, trying to snap herself out of the haze that she probably had no right to be in. “I need a towel or something.”_

_“The mitts I took off are on the counter.”_

_That voice drew her back, and all Emma could see was Regina stretching toward the cupboard. The skirt was pulled tight over well rounded hips and buttocks, and the expanse of leg was just enough to make things hazy again. Emma willed her eyes away and tried vehemently to concentrate on the task at hand._

_Finally, she saw the oven mitts, hiding in front of Regina. Without thought, Emma reached for them. It brought her in direct contact with the Mayor. Their bodies brushed, and everything stilled as a fire ignited._

_Regina’s gasp was loud enough to echo through the room._

_Emma’s belly slithered and knotted as awareness overtook her. She wanted nothing more than to mold their bodies together, and revel in the sudden intensity._

_The woman in question stood rigid and as still as a statue._

_Emma wanted none of that. If she could acknowledge the attraction even if it wasn’t out loud, she wasn’t going to let Regina ignore it.  Emma stepped closer still, nearly mashing her breasts to Regina’s back, causing already hardened nipples to tingle even more._

_Emma’s heart raced, and she found that she couldn’t breathe. She didn’t care. The heat between them was extraordinary._

_Regina’s chest began to heave. “No.”_

_“No what?”_

_Regina peered over her shoulder. Their eyes met somewhat, but she refused to turn and engulf herself in the gaze. “No to this Miss Swan.”_

_In a bold move, Emma snaked her hands around Regina’s torso. “You mean this?”  She whispered as she nuzzled Regina’s neck._

_Emma felt the moan before it was release into the air. “Yess!”  Regina gripped the countertop._

_“You feel it too.”_

_The moment was dangerously erotic. The tension between them was thick and palpable enough to form its own entity that stole the air from the room._

_Regina nodded and closed her eyes. Red lips were parted as she continued to breathe raggedly._

_“Why?”_

_Regina trembled. “I can’t allow—“_

_“It’s happening anyway.”_

_“Respect my wishes.”_

_Emma groaned. Her hands slowly moved upward toward the ultimate prize._

_As fingertips grazed her breasts, Regina’s resulting moan was loud and unforgiving. “Please!”_

_“Mom! Is dinner almost ready?!”_

_Emma moved away quickly, trying to recover some equilibrium._

_Henry crashed through the door. He paused and looked from one woman to the other. “Um…”_

_“Henry? Why don’t you take the condiments? We’ll be in shortly.” Regina interrupted with a sweet smile._

_He stared at them both for a few more seconds before shrugging. “Okay.”_

_They were alone again._

_Emma reached out, intending to finish their conversation._

_Regina reared back as if she were poison. “Don’t touch me!”_

_Throwing her hands up in surrender, Emma said, “I’m sorry. I wasn’t…look I won’t push this okay?”_

_Regina appeared to relax._

_“That doesn’t make it any less real.”_

_Regina’s lips formed into a hard line. “Dinner and our son are waiting, Emma.”  Her voice was deep with warning._

_Still, as Emma watched her leave the kitchen, she could have sworn she saw fear in Regina’s eyes.  They were not done. They were far from it._

 

_SQSQSQ_

Emma grinned as she pulled the blankets over her head. She secretly thanked whoever was listening that she hadn’t given up on them no matter where they were right now.

 

SQSQSQ

Having done it a million and one times, Regina flipped the pancake that was in the form of a familiar horse without thought. Her mind was elsewhere. While the real answers she needed continued to elude her, Regina had to acknowledge that she felt lighter after revealing her struggle to Emma.  There in lay the issue. Emma always made her feel lighter somehow. It would be simple to get lost in her, but Regina knew that would only make things worse.

Hence, the hesitation earlier this morning with Emma, but it in no way negated her further achievements this morning. Regina was up, showered, and she was making pancakes. It had been a ritual between her and Henry on the weekends as far back as she could remember. It felt incredible to relive it.

Henry rushed through the kitchen door. “Sorry! I woke up late. I can---“  He stopped and peered around the kitchen in confusion. “Um…you’re…making pancakes?” His voice went up an octave and his face flushed red.

Regina smiled. “I’m freshly showered as well.”

He ran toward her and stopped when they were only inches apart before launching himself into her arms. Regina chuckled and returned the embrace. She bent to kiss his head but stayed there soaking in his scent, his innocence. The warm heat of familiarity filled her, soothed her.  Regina had missed this, desperately.

Henry moved away reluctantly. He was beaming as he peered up at her, and his eyes were wet with tears. “You’re…feeling better?”  He asked hopefully.

“I am. I’m trying Henry.”

He nodded. “Can I make the coffee?”

“Of course.”

There was always room for new traditions.

SQSQ

“I was watching Iron Man in my room last night.”

Regina groaned inwardly. She had to remind herself to admonish Emma for putting a TV in Henry’s room. “One or two?”

His nose scrunched. “One. I didn’t like two that much.”

“Mmm,” Regina murmured as she took a bite of her breakfast.

“I have a question about it.”

Regina set her knife and fork down, giving him her full attention. “Yes?”

He blushed. “Do you think Pepper Potts is hot? Some of the boys in my class said she was. I never noticed, I guess, before now.”

Regina sucked in a deep breath to ward away the panic. Was he asking what she thought he was asking? He was too young to notice such things. Her baby really was growing up.

“You seem to like blondes because, you know, mom is a blonde.” Henry continued in the face of her silence.  He stared at her strangely. “Uh, mom? Are you freaking out?”

Realizing that she had been quiet for too long, Regina answered quickly. “No. No, of course not. I just needed a moment to think. She is a beautiful woman, but I would not describe her as  _hot_.” Regina paused, and she could not resist the grin tugging on her lips. “Your mother, on the other hand, is.”

“Hot?” Henry asked.

“Yes, decidedly so.”

A beat. “Ew.”

Regina laughed out loud. “Finish your breakfast. Are there any more questions?”

He shook his head violently. Regina continued to chuckle, hoping she had ruined him for life.  She took a deep swallow from her coffee, and realized that she felt lighter still.

 

SQSQ

Regina lounged on the couch with a book in her lap. The study felt stuffy and confining, so she found herself searching the library only to end up in the living area. The sun touched her with its rays from the many windows. She felt bathed in it. Her thoughts wandered as she attempted to devise a plan to return all the hearts. Her first thought had been to do it while they were sleeping. Regina discarded it almost right away, knowing her former subjects would not take kindly to her invading their homes.

She glanced down at her attire, and she felt almost normal if casual in khakis and matching shirt. It was a much needed break from the expensive pajamas she had found herself practically living in. It would have been even more normal if Emma was home filling the house with the sound of her heavy footsteps and laughter.

The doorbell rang.

Given her current thoughts, Regina hurried to the door. She stopped before opening it. At this point, she was sure Emma would just use her key. They had made some progress. There was no need for such formalities.

“Who is it?” Regina asked warily.

There was a long pause.  “Snow.”

Regina’s eyebrows shot to her forehead, and something lurched inside her.  She recalled Red’s insult hurling fiasco. At the moment, Regina did not feel meek and retreating.

She looked at it as progress. 

Regina yanked the door open and stared.

Snow blushed under her scrutiny. Her hands fiddled nervously.

“Are we making rounds today, Snow?”

Snow White bristled and lifted her head proudly. “You’ve talked to Emma.”

“Of course,” She smiled but knew it was only a hoity curl of her lips.

“I wanted to see if Henry was available for lunch. I haven’t seen him in a couple of days.”

“Are the phones in Storybrooke malfunctioning?”

Snow’s eyes flashed, but she bit her bottom lip. “I’m sorry. It was presumptuous of me to just show up.”

Regina was surprised at the apology but tried not to show it. “Yes, it was.”

“I could go and call you later. Maybe we could set up something for tomorrow?” Snow’s expression was hopeful.

Regina sighed. She could see that Snow was trying but decided not to make it difficult. Progress indeed.  “No, there’s no need. He’s in his room. I’m sure he would love to see you.”

Snow blinked. “Uh…what?” Confusion colored her pale features.

This was a lovely feeling all together--- to catch Snow White unaware this way. Regina decided she liked it. Her smile was full. “Come in.”

“Said the spider to the fly.”

Regina’s smile dimmed but laughter escaped any way. “Clever,” she muttered and nothing more.

Snow stopped in the foyer and peered at her as if waiting.

“He has new comics. If you let him take them with you, I’m sure he will come willingly.”

“That’s it?” Snow seemed to deflate.

Regina laughed harder. This really was delightful in an entirely different way. “It is.”

“You seem…spayed.”

A dark brow rose. “I assure you that isn’t the case. Ask your daughter. I’m sure she remembers. You, however, seem particularly nasty today.”

Snow colored and hung her head. When she looked up again, her eyes were a degree warmer. “I’m sorry. It seemed odd…you taking the high road.”

“Mmm, what is that colloquialism? It is what it is.”

Snow White pursed her lips but could not hide the smile. “We’ve been here too long.”

Regina only nodded. Part of her waited for the blame to come spewing from Snow’s lips.

Snow White turned and whisked up the stairs.  A second later, “Regina?”

Regina turned and stared into eyes so much like Emma’s that calm washed over her.

“Emma really loves you.”

“I know.”

 

SQSQ

Regina smiled fondly down at her son as he gave two of the women in his life the once over. She bit her lip as he glanced up his grandmother.

“Were you nice to her?”

Snow gasped.

“Henry,” Regina admonished. While it  _was_  Snow, she still didn’t want him to be disrespectful.

“No, mom. I’m not going anywhere with her until I know.”

“We were civil.”  Snow answered.

“As we could be at this point.”  Regina added.

He continued to peer at her. Regina kneeled in front of him. “I wouldn’t lie to you…not anymore.”

Henry smiled before hugging her. “I know. Do you need anything before I go?”

Regina wiped the hair from his forehead before kissing it. “No, I can fend for myself today.”

Henry nodded, and as Regina stood, she noticed that the strange look was back in Snow’s eyes.

“I’ll have him back by two.”

“Two thirty,” Regina offered.

They stared at each other for a few seconds as if waiting for the world to crumble around them and the sun to fall from the sky.

It did not.

Snow nodded and smiled wanly.

 

SQSQ

Now back on the plush couch, Regina reached for her book once more and decided to read it. She did not want to think too hard or too long about what just occurred. Still, it was nice not to feel gutted for once when she saw that woman. Regina’s actions…her responses felt right. It felt like her. Emma would be proud. Regina smirked at the thought and realized she was proud of herself as well.

She glanced down at her book, but the pages began to blur as she looked inside herself instead.

 

SQSQSQ

_They pulled in front of Snow White’s apartment building._

_Emma stopped the car and went a step further by pocketing the keys._

_“Don’t get comfortable Miss Swan. It’s still my car.”_

_“It is, but I thought it better if I kept the keys. Wouldn’t want you running.”_

_Regina glanced at her sharply. “I would never---“_

_“I know just fucking with you.”_

_“Mmm.” Regina could have said a million things in retort, but she didn’t. She chose to deal with the issue at hand. “Why did I agree to this again? You don’t need me here.”_

_“Because I’m the hottest piece of ass you’ve ever had, and you’d do anything to keep me?”  Green eyes sparkled with mirth.  “Besides, I need you here so they won’t think I’m delusional.”_

_Regina smirked. “Yes, they probably would want your head examined.”_

_Emma pouted. “You didn’t answer my first question.”_

_“What was that, dear?”_

_Emma pointed to her chest. “Hot piece?”_

_“Possibly.”_

_Emma removed her seat belt and shifted closer. “That’s not what you were saying a little while ago.”_

_As a moth, Regina moved even closer to the burning flame.  She traced Emma’s bottom lip with a fingertip. “Those were not the words that came out of my mouth,” she said fondly._

_Emma nipped at her finger. “Semantics.”_

_“Indeed.”_

_Emma leaned forward, bringing their mouths together. It was soft, fleeting, but lips clung. “You ready?”_

_Regina nodded and opened the passenger side door._

_Emma reached for her hand as they walked up the sidewalk. Regina squeezed thankful for the contact. This was not going to go well…at all.  She sighed and sped up their progress. “Come along, Miss Swan. Let’s go tell your parents that you’re my hot piece of ass.”_

_Emma burst out laughing._

_When they both entered, the Charming’s looked on in abject fear obviously at seeing both of them together. “Is Henry—“  James asked._

_“He’s fine, staying at a friend’s house tonight.”_

_“Oh.” Charming did not hesitate any longer. “What’s she doing here then?” He practically snarled._

_But it was Snow’s gasp that filled the room. She grabbed James by the elbow refocusing his attention._

_“What’s…what’s going on here?”  Snow asked hesitantly, accusingly. Her eyes were wide and full of anger._

_Emma squeezed her hand. It made Regina smile, but there was also something utterly satisfying about the situation. Snow had taken love from her only to give it back to her tenfold whether she wanted to or not._

_“There’s something you need to know---” Emma started._

_“No! no, no NO!” Snow screamed. “Don’t even say it. It’s impossible!” She pulled away from her husband and moved forward intent on invading Regina’s personal space._

_Regina felt Emma tense beside her but offered a reassuring squeeze._

_“What did you do to her?! Is this some new kind of curse?”_

_“I assure you that it’s not.” Regina answered calmly._

_“It must be. There is no way my daughter would want to be with a sick, twisted monster like you!” Snow hissed._

_“I’ll kill you myself if you’ve done something to her.” Charming added._

_Regina rolled her eyes. It wasn’t very original._

_“Fuck this. You will not speak to her that way especially in front of me.”_

_“What did you expect? For us to squee and braid each other’s hair?” Snow countered._

_However, that one was._

_Emma scoffed. “I’m not at child. I choose who I’m with, and I don’t care if you fantasize about eviscerating her!”_

_“More like lopping off her head.”_

_“Try it,” Emma growled._

_“I’m your father. You don’t threaten me!”_

_Emma pulled Regina closer. “She is mine. You don’t threaten what’s mine!”_

_While it wasn’t the most eloquent, something melted inside Regina at the words._

_“This,” Emma pointed at herself then Regina. “Is happening. It’s been happening, and it’s going to keep happening no matter what.”_

_“She’s bewitched you.” Snow’s tone was pleading._

_Emma smirked. “In ways you will probably never understand.”_

_Regina’s heart fell into her stomach, but somehow, it continued to beat wildly. It was supremely difficult for her to stand here quietly, but she knew it was what Emma needed._

_“Emma! She. Is. Evil! What kind of person are you to do that to yourself?”_

_“I know what she’s done. I was there for some of it, but I can’t keep fighting this. I don’t want to. In fact, I’m done fighting…period.”_

_“Then, maybe you should leave.” Snow whispered._

_“Maybe I should.”_

_Back outside, Emma seemed to be vibrating with rage. “Fuck! Fuck!”_

_“You knew this wasn’t going—“_

_“I know. I just didn’t expect them to be assholes.”_

_Regina chuckled and leaned into Emma as they walked to the car. Emma dangled the keys in her face. She took them but kept Emma’s hand in her own. “Thank you for defending me.”_

_Emma shrugged “I had to. I wasn’t going to let them tear you to shreds. Hasn’t anyone—“ Emma’s eyes widened. ”Oh.”_

_“No, you’re the first. I’m so used to doing it myself. I expected to be angry with you.”_

_“What are you?” Emma gazed at her warily._

_“This.” Regina stepped closer until their bodies were flush. She wound her hand into thick blond tresses and brushed Emma’s lips with her own._

_Emma made a sound in the back of her throat._

_The caress deepened, and Regina poured herself into it, expressing her thanks and her feelings in reverence and softness. Emma whimpered, but Regina stole the sound, keeping it as her own._

_Emma was breathless and dazed by the time they stepped apart. “Regina?”_

_“Yes?”  Regina’s fingers wandered over sculpted cheeks and kiss swollen lips. She had never been this way…so demonstrative, but she couldn’t stop._

_“You won’t shit a brick if I tell you that I love you?”_

_Warmth burst inside Regina, taking her breath and accelerating her heart. Green eyes gazed back at her as full as she had ever seen them.  Everything around them seemed to disappear and there was only this moment. Somehow, she felt more powerful than ever, and the resulting smile was slow, brilliant and wide. “I won’t.”_

 

_SQSQSQ_

Regina closed the book, but the grin on her face; she knew was much better than anything she could find in there. It was strange reminiscing on what she had because she wanted it back, vehemently.

Would Emma love her no matter who she was?

She wanted to believe it, after all she had forgiven so much. Regina needed to find something to believe in, in hopes it would help her start believing in herself again.  She felt a spark, a tiny thing, but it was there nonetheless.

The sound of the front door opening made Regina look at the clock. It was nowhere near two thirty.  She glanced toward the entryway.

Emma stood there with bags in her hand. “Hey.”

Regina’s heart quivered inside her chest. Her smile must have been blinding, because Emma gave it back in return.

Emma winked. “Lunch?”

“I’m starving.” Regina was surprised to realize that she actually was.

_**Still waiting for you to put something in that box down there. I'm actually quite proud of this chapter. It left me smiling. Let me know if it did the same for you.**_


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Final story in the Black, White, and Grey series. Post curse but with none of the convoluted mess of this season. Regina isn't herself and Emma is desperate for a return to normalcy.

**A/N: Wow guys I guess that answers that question of anybody being out there! Thank you. I assure you feedback keeps this story going! Okay, now. I consider this the real pivital chapter for Regina.  She is regaining some of her moxie....moxie. I like that word. A lot happens in my opinion and there is another intriguing Rumple sighting. I do hope you enjoy.**

* * *

 

 

Regina stood at the bottom of the stairwell peering upward. Inhaling deeply as a precursor to calm, she took the first step forward and found that it was not as daunting as she thought it would be. Her heart didn’t stop. Fear didn’t permeate. Loss was the only emotion that registered. This…this increased the new and burgeoning feelings of determination exponentially. With the second step, she conceded that with each day things were getting easier. It was easier to walk, talk, interact, and open herself to those who had been reaching out to her. She bit her lip and took the third and fourth step. By the fifth, Regina was moving briskly and had stopped counting.

At the top, Regina stopped to gather her wits. It was odd reacquainting herself to a part of the house that had been a sanctuary for both her and Emma. It was empty, cold just as she felt when this all began, but now there was warmth building inside her, boiling upward from somewhere deep.

Emma was no longer there, but they had been disconnected long before she left.

Emma was no longer there, but she was on her way back.

They would find each other again. They had already started. Of the utmost importance, Regina was putting out feelers to find herself as well. She walked toward Henry’s room and looked inside. It was almost immaculate with only a smattering of comic books on the bed to detract from the perfect lines. Pride bloomed inside her at the sight.  It was those little things that made life what it was.

In measured steps, Regina made her way to her own bedroom. She reached for the knob and shame assaulted her. Still, even saturated in the emotion, Regina pushed through it and opened the door. This site heralded the destruction of who she was, and Regina needed the memories to further her reconstruction of who she was becoming.

**SQSQSQSQ**

_It was too quiet. Regina strained her senses hoping to hear the murmur of voices, but there was nothing. Part of her wanted Emma to be out there waiting, and the other half pretended not to care at all either way. The suspense and dichotomy of emotion was irritating._

_Regina walked quickly toward her bedroom door, opening it._

_“Shit!” Emma Swan almost fell inside._

_Regina rolled her eyes, covering her surprise. “Was there something you needed, Miss Swan?”_

_Emma’s pale features were flushed bright red, but she didn’t let the embarrassment stop her. “Uh, I was just going to tell you that Henry was down for the count.”  She paused and tilted her head to the side, studying Regina. “Were you coming to check to see if I was still here?”_

_“Of course not!” Regina sputtered quickly, hoping to hide the strange battle waging inside her. “I was simply going to look in on him before I retired for the evening.”_

_Emma grinned. “Uh huh, in all your clothes?”_

_Regina’s eyes rolled. “After a bath obviously.”_

_Taking a minute step forward, Emma muttered, “Scared I’d walk in on you?”_

_Heat seemed to close in, surrounding Regina. Cautiously, she stepped back. “Good ni---“_

_“You’re flustered. I can tell.”_

_Regina scoffed. “You’re flattering yourself, dear.”_

_Emma shook her head. “I see right through you.” She took another step forward._

_Regina’s heart began to pound, and her breathing hitched. She remembered what Emma felt like: heat, softness, and safety.  She remembered how perfectly their bodies seemed to fit together, and the fire they generated. “Good night, Miss Swan!”  Regina attempted to close the door on her emotions._

_With a well-placed foot and a sure hand, Emma resisted. “I don’t think so Regina.” Emma pushed her way inside, closing the door behind her._

_Regina was trapped, and she had never been more afraid. This…between them had the potential to be something devastating. It had the potential to crumble everything she was to dust from the inside out. “You have no right.” Regina growled._

_Emma shrugged. “I told you our conversation wasn’t over.”_

_“You also stated that you weren’t going to push this…push me.” Regina said through gritted teeth._

_Emma ambled forward until there was barely any space between them. “I lied.”_

_Regina swallowed. Everything inside her burst with heat and ordered her to reach out to the source. Her stomach knotted. She covered it, trying to contain it all and stumbled backward, while Emma moved toward her with purpose._

_Their bodies met as Regina’s back made contact with the far wall. Regina balled the material of Emma’s shirt in her fist as need tore through her, needing some kind of tangible anchor that was not burning flesh._

_There did not seem to be an inch of her that wasn’t touching Emma Swan. Regina whimpered. Whimpered. The knot in her stomach turned into a pulsing mass that slithered awareness up and down her spine to pool wetly between her legs._

_The near painful arousal was not what frightened her._

_It was the feeling of rightness._

_It was the feeling that if she fell Emma would be there to catch her._

_With every ragged breath, their bodies grew closer. Emma loomed over her, holding her gaze and daring her to turn away. Her hands tightened around Regina’s waist. In deep green eyes, Regina saw need, but she also saw a similar fear._

_As scorching hands moved from her waist to travel over her hips, Regina knew that Emma’s need had won. She groaned, “Regina.”_

_Lips descended brushing over her forehead, cheeks and nose._

_Regina trembled like a wild thing, and each breath yielded a gasp. Her nails dug into Emma’s shoulders. “Please, n—“_

_With a mutual moan, Emma swallowed her token resistance, and the world around them ceased to exist. Lips met and clung hotly. Emma’s mouth teased. Her teeth nipped, and when Regina finally opened, she knew she was lost._

_Regina felt control spiral away, leaving her completely and utterly overwhelmed. She gasped into the kiss and began to fight back against emotions that should have been locked tight. Gathering strength, she pushed Emma away._

_Emma’s chest heaved, and kiss swollen lips parted in surprise. But, it was the expression in fully blown pupils that nearly floored Regina and sent her back into the embrace._

_Regina had never seen such hunger. She closed her eyes against it. “Please. Leave.”_

_Emma stepped forward, and Regina held up a shaking hand to ward her off. “This can’t happen. I can’t let you do this to me.”_

_“To you?” Emma rasped. “Didn’t you feel that?”_

_“It doesn’t matter. This. Will not happen!” Regina practically shrieked._

_Regina refused to let the hurt she could see replacing hunger deter her. “Please. Go.” She whispered._

_Emma shook her head and silently walked out of the bedroom door._

_Regina watched her go. Control was slipping through her fingertips. Control of her life, and she knew by degrees control of this town. Despite Henry’s current niceties, he still believed in that book, in the truth. She had to reel things in no matter how much it cost her. No matter how much it hurt._

_Emma just could not be._

**SQSQSQSQSQ**

Regina sat down on the edge of the bed. In this room, in this house, she mapped out her own destruction, but now, she wanted nothing more than to conduct a rebirth. She finally understood why she made the poisoned tart. It was not just to rid herself of the threat of Emma and maintain the curse. It was to rid herself of something she did not trust anymore: love and need. After all, those same emotions had been party to her downfall before.

When the curse was broken, Regina gave in, desperately clinging to all Emma had to offer. She had nothing else.  She peered around the room. It was in a state of disarray just as her life was at the moment.  She stood intent on making the bed… intent on putting the few articles of Emma clothing where they belonged in hopes it would reduce the clutter in her mind and offer some answers.

SQSQSQ

There were no answers hiding upstairs, but Regina did find a strange sense of peace. She let it radiate to a warm glow, savoring it while it remained. After making herself a cup of coffee, Regina, again, found herself in the living room. She burrowed into the couch intent on finally reading the book that she started a few days ago. It was not that she was enamored with F. Scott Fitzgerald in the slightest, but the underlining darkness in the prose of The Great Gatsby served to titillate. Regina reached for her coffee cup and grumbled quietly as she realized it had been left behind.

With barely a thought, it materialized on the table, saucer and all.  Reaching for it once more, Regina paused as epiphany struck.

Teleportation.

It was a spell that could be altered to fit her needs. Taking a measured breath, she expanded her magic and held out her hand. A heart appeared.

Regina laughed out loud.

It was deep, throaty.

It was freeing.

It was indeed strange how simple some things could be once some of the clutter was gone. Suddenly, the living room was too small. It seemed almost suffocating. Regina yearned for…something. No longer did she feel small, insignificant. She was growing, and Regina wanted to expand further. Outside. Despite the stares and sneers it was where she needed…where she wanted to be.  Besides, she had work to do. While teleportation was the proper spell, she actually had to see the recipient. Regina refused to take chances…not with this.

Regina’s trip the crypt had been quick and perfunctory. She parked her car on the main street, thankful for the darkly tinted windows. It was near lunch time so the bustle of people was to be expected. Regina glanced at the black bag. It was macabre carrying vital, functioning organs in such a fashion, but it needed to be done. Within a few minutes, one of the people she was looking for exited Granny’s Diner.  Regina worked quickly and smiled in triumph when the man stumbled and grasped at his chest in surprise. Recognition dawned on his face.  He scanned the area around him, but after a minute or so, he shook his head and scampered away.

That was one down and nine to go.

Less than an hour later, Regina’s work was done for the day. A sense of accomplishment stole over her. There would be no thanks and no singing praise. For once, her own voice was enough. Her heart thudded and fluttered. There was life in there, and right now, she wanted to grab hold of it, never letting go.

Regina slid on her sunglasses and opened the driver’s side door. She stepped out into the sun…into the population of Storybrooke a little less broken. Some people stopped and stared as she walked down the sidewalk. Others crossed over to the other side intent on avoiding her. It was a customary reaction, and Regina remained unfazed by it.

The sun was hot and illuminating, warming her further. On impulse, she crossed the street to the diner. An idea took shape and form. The restaurant was loud with laughter and conversation. It stilled somewhat as she moved in further. A powerful presence made her magical radar ping. Regina looked over her shoulder to the right to see Rumplestiltskin and Belle occupying a booth near the window. His eyes studied her. Then, his head dipped in greeting. Even though there was hate, there was also healthy respect. Regina returned the greeting in kind. She studied her surroundings again and saw the discreet gazes centered on him as well. It was good to know that she was not the only one.

Taking an empty seat near the counter, Regina waited. Apparently the novelty of her appearance waned. There were no more stares or flurries of activity bent on avoidance. A few seconds later, Red stopped in front of her.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” 

“I have to eat as well Miss Lucas.” Regina countered, bored already by Red’s display of dislike.

Red snorted.  She leaned forward, giving Regina and the rest of the patrons near her a view of ample cleavage.  “I hear Emma came to her senses, and left you.”

Regina bristled. Her anger was stinging in its intensity, causing her to lean forward as well. “While your anger is justified, you are free to say what you want concerning me, but I have a son…a family who is going through enough at the moment. So, if you possess any common sense you would keep news of our circumstance from your lips as if it were common fodder. I will not have gossip getting back to Henry,” Regina growled.

Red reared back as if she had been struck. “You’re…different.”

“Mmm. Can you prepare Emma’s usual and a tomato soup along with a side salad for me please?”

Red nodded sheepishly and turned away.

Regina felt Rumplestilkskin before she saw him. He eased into a vacant stool beside her.

“Regina.”

“Rumple.”

“It seems no matter how much time has passed we will always be looked upon with animosity,” He muttered.

“It is a foregone conclusion.” Regina agreed.

They lapsed into silence.  Today…this second, to be near this man, this imp, who shaped her and made her into his own image was a lackluster encounter, and that was being generous.  Regina’s order appeared in front of her, but Red wisely avoided continued interaction. She stood, intent on paying the check.

Rumplestiltskin rose as well. “Let me take care of that.”

Regina glanced at him sharply.

He gave her a tight smile and a chuckle in return. “No strings.”

Regina huffed but acquiesced. “Thanks are in order, I suppose.”

“No need, but when you get the chance, do darken my doorstep, dearie.”

A dark brow rose and something swirled in Regina’s stomach. “I don’t thi—“

“You’re making assumptions. It isn’t what you think. You’re not the only one who’s had to change, Regina.”

Regina remained quiet for a long moment as she searched her instincts for something ominous. She was surprised to find nothing. “I’ll consider it.”

Rumple handed the bags of food to Regina and smiled. “Tell your Sheriff hello.”

Regina chuckled.  “You've met her? Rude? Impulsive? And you are nowhere near her favorite person.”

“That I know.”  His eyes seemed to twinkle. “Good day, Regina.” With a parting nod, Rumplestiltskin limped away.

Suddenly, Regina noticed that there were many eyes on them. She almost smiled, but didn't. Progress. Yes, progress.

SQSQ

Upon entering the police station, the sound of muted gunfire and cries of pain greeted Regina. She smirked and rolled her eyes. Emma had obviously commandeered one of Henry’s hand held systems. Rounding the corner, Regina stopped and watched.

Sporting her usual uniform of tight jeans and accompanying button down shirt, Emma leaned back in her chair. Green eyes were riveted on the small machine in her hands, and her whole countenance seemed to sparkle with triumphant glee. It was a welcome sight. This was the Emma she knew. This was the Emma she loved, and the warmth that had been swirling all day became a definite heat.

“Miss Swan, it’s good to see you hard at work.”

Emma nearly jumped out of her skin, sending the handheld sailing across the desk. Their eyes met, and she beamed happiness with a smile so huge that it drew Regina in with it.

“Hey! This is a surprise!”

Still grinning, Regina added, “I’m sure. Were you planning to sit here on that thing all day?”

“Only until I had to pick Henry up.”

“Interesting.”

Emma’s lips pursed. “I miss my Xbox.”

“I thought it was for Henry?”

“Okay, damn, our Xbox.”

Regina chuckled and sat the bags on the Sheriff’s desk. “I brought lunch.”

“And you brought yourself. I like that better. It’s been a good while since you’ve been out and about on your own.”

“Indeed. I thought it was…time.”

Curious green eyes studied her. “Something’s different about you today.”

Regina ambled around the desk to get closer. “Mmm.” She leaned against the wooden monstrosity.

“What? You’re going to make me guess?”

“No, but I like a little mystery now and again. It breaks up the monotony.”

“No one could ever accuse you of being monotonous.”

Regina missed the banter between them. It was slow to resurface, but it was definitely present now. It brought with it the fire of familiarity that reminded her of what was simmering just underneath.  “Are you flirting with me, Miss Swan?”

Emma grinned. “Damn right I am. Is it working?”

“I’ll let you know.”

Emma laughed out right. “How’s that?”

“Mystery, remember?”

“Uh huh.” Emma reached out grasping Regina’s hand. Their fingers intertwined. “I’ve missed this by the way. I’m glad you’re here, and I’m glad things are better.”

Regina bit her lip and ducked her head. “I think I’ve made some progress.”

“I think we have too.” Emma squeezed Regina’s hand.

“I agree. There are some things I want to share with you… soon.”

Emma nodded. “I’m here if you need me. I may not know all the big words that you do, but I’m willing to sound them out.”

Regina’s lips twitched, and she felt herself falling a little more in love with a woman who already completely owned her heart. “Emma?”

“Hmm?” Green eyes twinkled.

“It’s working.”

Grinning, Emma pulled her forward until Regina loomed over her seated form. Reaching up, she ran and hand through dark tresses. Regina shivered pleasantly. Fingertips continued to toy at the ends, ensnaring Regina even more. Her stomach twisted as the green gaze dropped from her eyes to her lips and back again.

“What do I get?” Emma asked huskily.

Buoyed by the events of the day, swirling emotions, and Emma herself, Regina did the only thing that felt natural…felt right.  Leaning in further, Regina brought their lips together softly, reverently.

Regina heard and felt Emma’s breath catch. They parted but continued to breathe the same air.

“Regina?”

“Yes?”

“I’ve missed this too.”

Regina closed her eyes, looking away. “I’m sorry. I deprived you of it for so long.”

“No, look at me.”

Opening her eyes, Regina found herself captured.

“I get it, and I’m not going any damn where. Okay?”

She could see the conviction the sincerity shinning back at her. “Okay,” Regina whispered.

Emma surged forward. This kiss was full of promise and abbreviated passion.

“Emma, I wanted to check---“

Startled by the sound of a more than familiar voice, Regina began to move away, but Emma held her still with her hand and her eyes.

“Oh,” Charming finished.

Emma glanced toward her father briefly in greeting before her gaze eased back to where it obviously wanted to be. “What were you saying?” She asked him.

“Am I interrupting something?” His tone was irritable and dripping with condescension.

Twirling a dark lock around her finger, Emma muttered, “No.” As if they were no way that he could…as if he existed on another plane all together.

It was an amazing thing to have all that focus and intensity centered on her. Regina ignored the disdain she could hear in Charming’s voice. This was the only thing that mattered.

“You’re obviously busy. I’ll come back later.” He turned to go.

“Charming?”

“Yeah?”

“You should talk to Snow. I don’t want to have to repeat myself…again.” Green eyes flashed briefly, but Emma’s gaze remained.

He left quietly.

SQSQSQ

Emma found herself humming along to the music on the radio. It was dangerously off key, but she smiled and continued anyway. She turned the cruiser into the school parking lot. There was still ten minutes until the bell. As far as she was concerned that was plenty of time to continue reminiscing.

Regina had been there in her office live and in living color, and her heart refused to stop racing just based on that reason alone. It almost seemed like nothing had changed, but it had. As far as Emma was concerned, it was for the better.

The kiss.

The kiss…as soft as it was…as sweet as it was blew her mind completely, and shot her way into the stratosphere. Emma still hovered there. She hadn’t noticed the tightness around her chest before until it dissipated. It was definitely easier to breathe from up there.

The shrill sound of the school bell greeted her. Emma turned the music down and waited. She didn’t have to wait long. The passenger side door opened with a squeak. Henry’s bag flew in the backseat before the boy himself made himself comfortable.

“Hey, kid.”

Henry stared at her. “You’re all glowy.”

Emma frowned. “I am not!”

“You so are.”

“Whatever.”  Emma countered.

“So?”

Emma pulled away from the parking lot. “What?”

“Why are you glowy?”

Emma scowled, but it quickly turned into a grin. “Because.”

Henry sighed, causing Emma to laugh.

“It can’t just be you and your sunshine?”

He glared.

Emma laughed harder. “Your mom came to see me today.”

Henry’s eyes softened then shined with joy. “She came to your office?”

“Yep. Brought me lunch and everything.”

“She’s been making me pancakes again too.”

“Now, you’re all glowy.”  Emma informed him.

Henry rolled his eyes. “This is good. Right, mom?”

“It’s really good, kid.”

“Maybe you can come home soon?”

There was nothing she wanted more. “When your mom is ready.”

The smile on his face could rival her own.

“She’s been kissing and hugging me a lot more. She do that to you too?”

Emma smirked. “Oh yeah.”

Henry sighed again. “That sounded weird…that sounded—“ His nose scrunched. “Like when mom said you were hot.”

“She thinks I’m hot?”

“Decidedly was the word she used.”

Emma grinned. “You can tell her I think she’s hot too.”

Henry glowered. “No…no.” He shook his head vehemently.

The car filled with Emma’s laughter. Her tilted world corrected itself just a little bit more.

**So yeah...I'm still begging like the bitch I am. That box...right there. Don't be afraid. I don't bite...promise ;)**

 

 

 

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Final story in the Black, White, and Grey series. Post curse but with none of the convoluted mess of this season. Regina isn't herself and Emma is desperate for a return to normalcy.

**A/N: First thanks for the feedback for the last chapter! I've been busy writing this one so I haven't replied yet. But! I will do so before the weekend is over. So here we are again, yeah? Can you tell I'm addicted big time to this story? This is probably the last update until late next week, but you never know! This one is a bit longer than the last. There are some sexy times both in the present and in retrospect but nothing overly graphic as of yet. I've also turned Charming into a man I can tolerate. I treat the Emma/Charming relationship a bit differently than the show...okay a lot. He's still an ass but he's an ass to look upon fondly. Hope you enjoy.**

* * *

 

Emma turned the cruiser easily, using only one hand as she shrugged her cell phone closer to her ear. “Pancakes used to be a weekend thing.”

“I’m expanding. Are you complaining?” Regina asked.

“No…not in the least. I love your pancakes.”

There was pause.

“I didn’t mean that in a pervy way, but regardless I **love** your pancakes.” Emma could almost hear the eye roll.

“How charming.”

“I try.”  Emma grinned. “So what shapes did you make me?”

“Handcuffs.”

Emma released a bark of laughter. “Really?”

Regina sighed in amusement. “No. Not really. I tried for the shape of that god awful car you insist on keeping.”

“Awww, I’m touched.”

“You should be.” Regina countered.

“Coffee?”

“You do ask for the world. Don’t you Miss Swan?”

Miss Swan. It sounded more and more normal every time Regina said it. There was something about it that made the hairs on the back of Emma’s neck stand up…in a good way. It always had.

“Mmm, your day would be boring without me and my bright, perky sunshine.”

It was Regina’s turn to laugh. “Indeed it would.”

“I’m down the street. Be there in a sec.”

A throat cleared.

Emma sighed and tried not to roll her eyes. She had almost forgotten he was there. “It’s needs to be to go unfortunately. I have… company.” She cut her eyes toward her father.

“Do tell Charming that I said hello.”

Emma clucked her tongue. “Regina…be nice.”

Sounding affronted, Regina added, “I was!”

Still, Emma could hear the amusement in her tone. “Uh huh, like when a crocodile smiles?”

Regina chuckled. “I’m growing.”

“Mmm hmm.”  Emma pulled into a familiar drive way and ended the call.  She glanced at her father. “Maybe she’ll even send some coffee for you.”

Charming huffed, and opened his mouth to no doubt deliver a scathing retort. Emma was out the door before he could utter a word.

Emma walked briskly not for the pancakes but to see the woman behind them. They had moved a little further up the mountain they were both climbing, but Emma knew that Regina had an individual journey at the peak. She could do nothing but encourage it.

The door opened before she reached it.

Regina smiled as Emma clomped her way up the stairs. She thrust a paper bag and large thermos at her. “Eager?” She asked.”

“Something like that,” Emma smirked, taking in the fully clothed former Mayor. She looked as though she was ready to conquer the world in dark slacks, matching vest and crisp white shirt. It made her nerve endings sizzle. “He’s going to be touched that you made enough coffee to share.”

“Mmm,” Regina’s lips quirked, and before Emma could stop her, she waved at Charming with false enthusiasm.

Emma rolled her eyes but bit her lip to keep from laughing. “That’s not a very attractive look for him is it?”

Charming scowled back at them.

Regina’s smile was bright and contagious. “Not at all.”

“We’re so bad.” Emma added with glee.

Emma peered into dark eyes that suddenly seemed to smolder. “Mmm. Possibly. This, however, feels good.” Regina grasped Emma by a belt loop, pulling her forward.

Nodding, Emma didn’t need clarification. She allowed herself to be led, until there was barely space in between them. She leaned down, intending a chaste kiss to punctuate the rightness of it all.

Regina grinned as their lips touched, and Emma had to taste it…to savor the giddy emotions bubbling between them. She deepened the caress. Regina pulling her closer by the lapels of her shirt made Emma’s belly twist.

The kiss ended slowly. Emma found that she couldn’t drag her lips away and trailed them upward until they brushed Regina’s forehead.  “You’ve been sampling the pancakes,” she husked raggedly.

“Just a little,” Regina whispered just as breathless. Her face was flushed red.

“I bet they taste better on you.”

“Probably.”

Their foreheads touched. “You’re flustered,” Emma muttered.

Regina bit her bottom lip and nodded. “I am.”

Emma groaned inwardly. The word sexy just did not cut it. “Should I apologize?”

“No! It’s nice to be able to feel it.”

“Good.” Emma paused and exhaled noisily. “I’ve got to—“

“Go. I know. Call me later?”

“Oh yeah.”

Despite knowing that she needed to leave, Regina refused to let her go at first. Emma smirked and nibbled on lips that turned up to meet hers once more.  She backed away slowly.

Their gazes remained locked until she smacked into the car. Emma waved goofily. Regina threw her head back and laughed.

Things were pretty good.

She slid into the driver’s seat and put the cruiser in reverse. Charming continued to scowl. “I feel like I should douse you with hand sanitizer or something.”

Emma peered at him, and she couldn’t help but to do it fondly. She was in a good mood. “Chastity belt too?”

“Yes!”

Smirking, Emma muttered. “She’d find a way to unlock it.”

Charming covered his face with his hands. “My God… the images.”

Oh yeah…the images. Shaking herself free of them, Emma scoffed. “I’ve watched you swallow my mother’s face how many times now?”

“That’s different.”

Emma’s eyes narrowed as she glanced at him. “Nooo, I don’t think so.”

“We’re married.”

“I’ll marry her. No problem there.”

Charming groaned. “You’re insufferable.”

“Heh, that’s what she said.”

“Please stop.”

Emma cackled. “Why?”

“Because I want to kill Regina in her sleep.”

Emma glared.

He threw his hands up. “Look, I know your mother is trying. I am too.”

Emma continued to glare.

“After a fashion. I just don’t want you shoving it down my throat.”

A blonde brow rose. “Turn your head next time, then.”

Charming sighed. “That won’t help. You two ooze---“

“I know. Ain’t it hot?” Emma grinned devilishly.

“Emma! Shoving it down my throat remember?”

“That’s what she said!” Emma could not help herself. Her father looked scandalized, and she sure as hell wasn’t going to let him ruin her mood. Poking fun at him was the only logical choice. Plus, it was damn entertaining.

Prince Charming hung his head and slouched in his seat.

A few minutes later, Emma’s phone beeped.  She glanced at the text and stopped the car in the middle of the street.

_Come over for dinner tonight?  Regina wrote._

“Emma!”

“Shhh!” She waved her father off as she texted with her thumb.

_You sure???_

_Yes, very. I may even let you play Xbox. Regina answered._

_Yay! That was for you not the xbox._

_Stop grinning. I’m sure your father thinks you’re having a seizure._

Emma laughed out loud. She was indeed grinning like an idiot.

_Should I bring anything? Emma asked._

_Just yourself and don’t tell Henry. I want to surprise him._

_Will do. See you at 6?_

_6:07 for you. Regina answered._

Was there anyone on this earth that knew her better than this woman? It was an incredible feeling to feel accepted no matter what, and Emma wanted to give it back to Regina tenfold.

A horn blared.

Emma glanced to her right sheepishly. “Somebody’s impatient.”

“He’s been sitting there for five minutes,” Charming grumbled.

“I was having a moment.”

He sighed. “Is it safe to ask? Why didn’t she just call?”

“How did you---nevermind. What does it matter?”  Emma beamed. She literally could not help herself. “She invited me to dinner.”

Emma knew her excitement would be infectious. She could see it in his eyes. “You’re not going to squeal like a girl or anything are you?”

“Uh no! I don’t do that!”

Charming eyed her. “I don’t know. Seemed awfully girly to me.”

Emma frowned.

His eyes twinkled even more. “So you wear the pants, huh?”

Smiling widely, Emma winked at her father. “You really want to know?”

He cleared his throat and peered through the windshield. “Is that Grumpy stumbling all over the place?”

SQSQSQ

The chair creaked as Emma leaned back in it.  She wiped her mouth with an errant napkin.

“It’s rude not to share, little sister.”

She rolled her eyes. “It’s rude to stare too.”

Charming had been right. Grumpy was stumbling all over the place. She expected liquor to leak from his eyeballs.

“Your father wouldn’t talk to me like that.”

“I’m not my father, and he’s not here.”

“I’m revered by the Charmings.”

Emma snorted. “Whatever.”

“There’s not even a morsel left?”

“Should I ask Regina to make more next time?” Emma asked sweetly. She turned to look at him.

Grumpy peered at her from behind the bars and made gagging sounds before it turned into a yawn.

It didn’t bother her in the slightest. “Time to go night night.”

He mumbled.

After a few more minutes, his snores were serenading her. Emma groaned and reached for the handheld. At least she had something to do until school was out. Then, there was dinner. Emma could do nothing to clamp down on the giddy feeling that invaded. Dinner at home.  There had been hundreds of them before, but this one was different. It was a stepping stone to where her life should be…where it had been.

**SQSQSQSQ**

_“Am I doing this right?” Henry asked._

_Emma peered at her son. “Yeah, but keep your fingers out of the way. Your mom would kill me if she knew I let you do that, and I don’t want blood soaked veggies.”_

_“The soy sauce would cover it up.” Henry grinned._

_She chuckled. “You’re definitely my kid.” Emma bumped him with her hip._

_His face scrunched. “You sure you’re not going to burn this? You set a pot of water on fire the last time.”_

_“There were reasons. I fell asleep.”_

_Henry eyed her. “I don’t think that’s what you guys were doing.”_

_Emma tried the blush but felt it coming anyway. “Parents take naps together all the time.”_

_He continued to stare._

_Rolling her eyes, she muttered. “You’re way too smart. Do we need to have a talk?”_

_“Ew no. I learned about that stuff in school, but there wasn’t a chapter on…the two mommy thing.”_

_Emma snorted. She continued to dice the chicken._

_The kitchen door opened. “Do you need—“_

_“No!” Emma and Henry said simultaneously._

_Regina rolled her eyes and closed the kitchen door._

_Henry giggled. “She thinks you’re going to burn something too.”_

_“I’m the Savior. You guys should have more faith in me.”_

_He was silent, but she could hear the eye roll that was so much like his mother’s.  Henry put the array of vegetables in a big bowl. Emma scooped up the chicken with a knife intending to mix everything together._

_Henry gasped. “You can’t do that!”_

_“What?!” She cried._

_“Mix things with raw chicken.”_

_“It’s all going in the wok!”_

_“Not at the same time. Do I need to call mom?”_

_Emma glared. “Fine.”  She put the vegetables in first. They sizzled happily._

_“Why are we cooking dinner? Mom’s will taste better.”_

_“We’re doing something nice for her like she does for us…all the time.”  Emma gave him a pointed look. “We need to give her a break every once in a while.”_

_Henry looked at the wok. “By burning dinner?”_

_Emma cried out to see the contents of the pot smoking. “Damn it! I had it up too high.” She removed it from the heat and put it in the sink._

_“You were standing here the whole time!”_

_Emma glared at her son. His eyes were shining with mirth. His laughter came next followed by a sigh coming from the vicinity of the door._

_They turned toward Regina._

_Grinning, Emma met her gaze and shrugged. “It’s the thought that counts right?”_

_Regina made a sound in the back of her throat._

_“I love you?” Emma simpered._

_Regina’s admonishing gaze turned soft and chocolate. Her smile was big enough for Emma to get lost in. “You’re insufferable, Miss Swan.”_

_The sound that came from Henry’s mouth was very close to a snort.  Emma cuffed him in the back of the head._

_“Yes, I know, but I guess we could let you help.” Emma said._

_“Indeed, if we we’re hoping to eat tonight.”_

**_SQSQSQSQSQ_ **

Memories were all well and good, but Emma wanted reality. She couldn’t help but feel that tonight was another step in the right direction.

SQSQSQSQ

Nervousness. Her heart thundered in her chest; her palms were on the other side of sweaty; and she could barely keep still even after a morning of replacing hearts.

It wasn’t an emotion Regina was overly familiar with, but it most certainly had always been associated with Emma Swan. She was the only woman…only person that Regina had ever met who could discombobulate her.

As Regina stalked the shelves in the local supermarket, she found that she had plenty of time to analyze the feeling. Regina wanted tonight to be perfect, but she knew there was no such thing as perfection, so she was going to get as close as she possibly could.

This was Emma, Regina tried to tell herself. She knew the woman better than her own skin. There was no reason to be nervous.

This was Emma. There were many reasons for her to be nervous because she brought with her a rush of emotion that at times left Regina without the ability to breathe. However, after the past few days and this morning, Regina found that she functioned just fine breathless.

It was a dichotomy of immense proportions to say the least.

Regina stopped in front of the tomatoes and sorted through them. The woman next to her stilled and stared before her body became completely immobilized. It completely disrupted Regina’s train of thought.

She rolled her eyes and tried to maneuver around. “Excuse me.”

The fear on the woman’s face was palpable, and it irritated Regina to no end. “Pardon me.” Regina said louder. Other customers milling about stopped and looked.

Regina sighed and decided to try another tactic. She racked her brain in search of the woman’s name, but came up blank. “Miss, I’m here to shop for my family as I assume everyone else is. I won’t bite, but I would like to get to the onions.”

The woman blinked and seemed to relax by degrees. She nodded and moved out of the isle. Relief filled Regina, and despite the stares she meant to continue her shopping.

“Your Majesty?”

That caught Regina’s attention. Her head snapped in the direction she had just vacated.

“They keep the best ones in the back.”

Confused, Regina was intent on seeking clarification. “I’m sorry?”

“The onions. The best ones are in the back of the stall.”

“Ah, Amber, isn’t it? Thank you.” Regina paused and added just because it felt right. “I’m the queen no longer. It’s just Regina now.”

Amber’s eyes widened, but she nodded in understanding before disappearing around the corner.

The sound of laughter greeted Regina’s ears. She turned to find Belle ambling toward her. A dark brow quirked. “Do you find something amusing?”

“More like ironic. Rumple had a similar experience here a while back.”

“So now I assume that you do all of the shopping?”  Regina inquired curiously.

“Not really. Only when I want something edible. He approached the situation much as you just did. Interesting.”

“Yes, very curious,” Regina added drolly.

“Everyone has to change, I guess.”

“Mmm, how very astute of you.” Regina offered. Belle’s expression was an interesting hybrid of empathy and sympathy. It was strangely uncomfortable. “If you don’t mind, I don’t have an abundance of time.”

Belle smiled. “Have a nice afternoon, Regina.”

“I hope you do as well,” Regina returned and watched her go.  It gave her something to think about, and she found that for now the nerves had dissipated.

SQSQSQSQ

In the kitchen, Regina stirred her homemade sauce as it simmered. The area filled with familiar smells, but she admitted it had been months since she had the energy and the wherewithal to cook in this fashion.

Pieces of her were returning bit by bit. Even though the puzzle wasn’t completed, Regina felt more human and more alive than she had in ages. Hope had returned. Love had muscled its way back in, reminding her loudly that it had not left in the first place. With it came need, desire and an entire host of other emotions where there had only been emptiness and despair before, and because of it all, she had found her passion for Emma again. Regina knew better than to rush these feelings, but that would not keep her from reveling in them.

**SQSQSQSQSQ**

_Regina put the lid on the last Tupperware bowl as the door swished open. There was no need to turn, she knew who it was._

_“Henry’s dead to the world,” Emma muttered._

_“Mmm, you can return in the morning and get him. He won’t be too hap---“_

_“I won’t be going home tonight,” Emma interrupted._

_A delicious tingle started from the back of Regina’s neck and ended at her spine. Before she could recover, hands snaked around her torso, burning her, but the body molded to her from behind was scorching._

_Emma’s lips trailed wetly over the exposed skin of her neck. Then, teeth nipped. Need coiled hotly in Regina’s stomach. “Emma,” she whispered._

_Hearing her name seemed to spur Emma on. She groaned as she pulled Regina’s shirt from her skirt and growled when her hands met flesh._

_The sound alone left Regina shaken as arousal slammed into her unforgivingly. She whimpered and turned just enough for their lips to meet sloppily._

_There was no pretense. Emma meant to devour, and Regina had no choice but to give in and do the same._

_Emma’s fingertips brushed against Regina’s breasts and before she could register the feeling and enjoy its subtleties, hands were underneath the meager material that covered them, kneading and plucking at already hardened tips._

_Regina cried out at the sudden wave of heat. It was unlike anything she had felt before. It was terrifying in its intensity, but she just held on willing to lose herself in it._

_Emma’s hips pulsed against her, reminding her that she was just as much a slave to the fire between them as she was._

_Material was ripped and buttons flew and cool air met Regina’s over heated skin. Emma bit hard into her shoulder setting everything ablaze again. Regina reached back winding her hands into thick blond tresses, silently begging for more._

_Emma did not hesitate, teasing Regina’s nipples as her teeth sank into flesh.   Arousal gushed going from a defined trickle to a raging river._

_“Emma!”_

_The woman in question moaned and spun her around._

_Their lips crashed together. Tongues met wetly, and Regina’s synapses that were not crackling before came to glorious life._

_There was nothing but this._

_If Emma had set out to overwhelm, she had done it in spades._

_Hot lips scored her torso as busy hands inched up Regina’s already short skirt._

_Emma’s tongue flicked her nipple at the same time panties slid their way down Regina’s thighs. If it was meant as a distraction, there was no need._

_Regina leaned back against the counter, supporting herself on shaking arms. She peered down and watched, mesmerized as half her breast disappeared within Emma’s mouth._

_They both groaned loudly._

_The urgency dialed upward toward epic._

_“Bedroom,” Regina muttered raggedly._

_Lips met hers and clung._

_“I… can’t wait that long.” Emma husked in return. She yanked the skirt up until it was around Regina’s waist before depositing her on the counter._

_Wet lips seared her torso and Regina watched in awe as Emma sank to her knees, widening trembling thighs with her shoulders._

_Their gazes met. Communicating things they weren’t ready to say, but there was this…this fire…this need finally being sated._

_Emma’s tongue slid from her mouth. Regina watched with heaving chest and braced herself to be ripped apart._

_Tongue met aroused flesh._

_Emma’s resulting moan was deep, needy, but Regina cried out and curled in on herself as pleasure rippled. Her hands sank into Emma’s hair, tugging hard as if trying to take her completely inside._

_One word fell from her lips, “Emma!”_

**_SQSQSQSQSQ_ **

Regina bit her lip and cleared her throat around a smile that just would not go away. Her heart thudded and her stomach pulsed. But, to feel that depth of feeling again even if it was a whisper unrealized was an achievement.

With a trembling hand, Regina continued to stir the sauce. Maybe Belle had been right. Look what change had brought her so far.

SQSQSQ

“Mom! I’m home!” Henry bellowed.

“Kitchen, Henry.”

The door swished. “Whoa, is that…lasagna I smell?”

Regina glanced over her shoulder, giving him a grin in return. “It is.”

“I’m glad I didn’t have my usual milkshake.”

Regina glared.

Henry smiled. “Mom didn’t even bring it up.”

“How gracious.” Regina added in mock irritation. She was well aware of Emma and Henry’s routine.

His eyes twinkled as if he knew too. He really was too smart for his own good.

“Can I help with anything?”

“Well, I am in the building stage.”

“Let me wash my hands!”  His excitement was endearing.

They worked meticulously building layers of pasta, sauce and cheese.

“You can cook this for your own family someday.”

“You think so?” Henry looked skeptical.

“Yes. You’re stubborn like your mothers. You’ll keep doing it until it’s right.”

He blushed. “You’re probably right.”  After a few seconds, Henry added. “Mom loves your lasagna.”

Regina chuckled. “She loves my pancakes as well.”

“Moooom!”

She hid her amusement behind a wave of hair as she wrapped the pan of lasagna in plastic and placed it in the refrigerator. “Yes, Henry?”

“You know what I meant. We should invite her over.”

“I’ll give it some thought. Would you like to help make the bread as well?”

His face brightened. “Yeah.”

“Then, we can see about homework.”

Henry scowled, looking so much like his mother that Regina laughed.

SQSQSQSQ

The doorbell rang. Regina looked down at her watch to see that it was 6:03. Emma was getting better and she was intent on keeping their little surprise.

Regina went to the kitchen door and poked her head out. “Henry? Can you see who’s at the door?’

“Okay mom.”  He put his handheld game system down.

Regina pressed against the door and waited. Blessedly, the nervousness from earlier remained dormant.

“Mom?!”

“Hey, kid. Surprise?”

Something that felt like happiness surged within Regina. She walked into the living room to find Henry hugging his other mother.

“She set this up didn’t she?”

“I’ll never tell but she might.”

Their eyes met, and before Regina could get lost, Emma winked. “Hey”

Regina knew she was beaming. “Emma,” she murmured in greeting.

Henry turned at the sound of her voice and dive bombed her with affection. “You’re just…the greatest you know?”

Swallowing back the prickling of tears, Regina answered as she returned his embrace, “I love you too, Henry.”

Then, Emma was there, ruffling Henry’s hair and surrounding Regina in a warmth deep enough to feel in her bones. She glanced up into green eyes, and before she could think, Regina’s body, her heart took over and pulled Emma into a kiss.

Emma smiled into the caress.

Things were pretty good.

 

**Sooo yeah? You see my box? Fill it up...**

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the last story in a series starting with Black, White, and now ending with Grey. Post curse but with none of the convoluted mess of this season. Regina isn't herself and Emma is desperate for a return to normalcy.

**A/N: Let me remind everyone that this story is not exactly canon. I've taken some liberties. Also, sorry about the delay. I've been sick, but I hope the long update makes up for it. This one is huge as in verbose and as in a major turning point for Regina. I also finally pull together the Rumplestiltskin sightings. I am a little nervous about this one and hope you guys understand where I'm coming from. Hope you enjoy and when you get to the end, remember flashbacks are you friend as well as mine.**

* * *

 

_The unknown woman struggled against her bindings, and her eyes could barely contain the terror that seemed to leak from her pores. Even though she was not saying a word, Regina could see the silent plea for her life with every harsh breath she took._

_“Don’t ask me to do this. I can not!” Regina exclaimed._

_He slithered behind Regina, bringing with him the smell of damp earth and growing things. “Why dearie? Because she’s an innocent?”_

_“Yes!”_

_“You were an innocent once. Did that stop your mother? Did it stop Snow White?”_

_A burning rage heated in her belly before seeping to every corner of her being.  Regina seemed to glow with it._

_“Ah, that’s it. The anger…the hate it will remind you that there are no innocents. They are all just stepping stones, dearie. Now, reach in and take what is yours. Conquer and command then, crush at your will just like I taught you.”  Rumplestiltskin slithered around her whispering in her ear, reminding Regina of what she’d lost…of what had been taken._

_Slowly, Regina walked toward the woman. The air seemed to bend around her, crackling with a seductive energy. Regina smiled and the woman began to whimper. The sound alone solicited a high more intoxicating than she had ever known. Regina reveled in it._

_Her smile turned into a dark laugh._

_The woman began to scream._

_Licking her lips in anticipation, Regina leaned in, smelling the woman’s fear. She wanted to bathe in it. Soft fingertips followed the woman’s thrumming pulse, trailing down to the source between breasts. Without thought and any more hesitation, Regina’s hand began to glow as she pushed through flesh, muscle and bone to capture what was hers._

_Frightened eyes were mesmerized, captured by Regina’s gaze. Then, all sound stopped as finger tips wrapped around the pulsing organ. Regina marveled at the feel of life pumping through her hand. It bolstered her because surely as she controlled life she could be the mistress of death as well._

_The heart was bright red and quivering furiously. Eyes that held terror a few scant seconds ago were vacant and docile. With a wave of Regina’s hand, the woman’s bindings dissipated._

_The woman stood waiting for a command._

_Rumplestiltskin clapped and giggled with glee._

_Using her thoughts, Regina transmitted orders. The woman walked toward her and stopped in the minute space left between them. Then, she sank to her knees in supplication._

_Regina sneered before mad laughter surrounded her again._

_Hatred coursed through her, leaving a blood red haze. Regina clenched her fingers around the heart. It jittered in her palm as if fighting for its last chance at life. With each pump, she squeezed harder until the organ burst in her palm, leaving a gory smear and gritty dust._

_Regina watched as the light dimmed in the woman’s eyes before her form toppled over still and lifeless._

_SQSQSQSQSQ_

Regina awakened with a scream on her lips. Sluggishly, she sat up in bed and cringed at the feel of sweat soaked sheets surrounding her. Still breathing hard, she brought a hand to her chest to make sure her own heart was still present where it had abandoned her so long ago. She was shaken by the memories. Pushing a trembling hand through damp hair, Regina stared into nothingness in an attempt to center herself. Remembered power coursed through her, reminding her of what she had…of what she could be. Regina, pushed the poisoned thoughts aside. The time for that had come and gone. It was astounding how easy it was.

“Mom?” Henry asked as he knocked on the door. “Are you okay? I thought I heard—“  He pushed his way inside until he was standing near the bed. Astute green eyes studied her, seeing far more and understanding far more than he should. “Bad dream?”

Regina nodded.

Henry shuffled his feet. “I know I’m not mom.”

Regina raised an inquisitive brow. “Henry?”  Her voice was rough and thick with sleep.

He shrugged. “Sometimes I’d hear you screaming, and it was different from…you know?”  Henry blushed a deep red. “It scared me so I asked mom about it, and she told me you had nightmares sometimes. So, I’m not mom, but can I help?”

Regina was wide open and vulnerable, but she did not hesitate to throw the covers aside and allow him entry. The beaming smile he gave her was reward enough, but the hug tipped the scales entirely.

“Mom didn’t sing to you or anything did she?”

Regina physically cringed. “Blessedly no.”

“She tried to sing me back to sleep once after a bad dream. I had to cover my head with the pillow to get her to stop.”

Chuckling, Regina kissed her son’s head. “Our Emma is special.”

“So…you guys are still---“  His voice was small, hesitant.

Regina held him tighter, knowing that he needed some reassurance. “Feelings haven’t changed, Henry. I have. I want our family back together, but there’s some work to be done first.”

Henry nodded.

The minutes ticked by slowly, and Regina reveled in the warmth Henry offered. Her thoughts raced. The dream had not been a coincidence. It was a reminder of what Rumplestiltskin had offered her days ago. It was a reminder of what he offered her years ago, but this time something was different. The dark power lurked still, but the usual evil intent seemed to be lacking.

“Feel better, mom?”  Henry snuggled closer.

“I do.”  Regina realized that this was actually the truth. The anxiety she had awakened with was long gone. “Thank you.”

“Glad I could help.”

“Mmm. So, I have a plan. It’s Saturday so pancakes are in order. Then, how about spending some time with your grandparents?”

Henry’s eyes narrowed as he looked at her, appearing so much like his mother.

“What?”

He continued to glare. “You’re up to something.”

Regina laughed. “You see entirely too much, but yes, there is a something I need to attend to.”

SQSQSQSQSQ

Sometime later, Regina answered the phone with a knowing smile. “Good morning.”

“Mmm, hey,” Emma responded sleepily.

“I’m afraid there are no left overs this morning, Miss Swan.”

“Really?” Emma whined.

Regina’s smile widened. “Really, and your son is visiting his grandparents. Snow picked him up a little while ago. I sent the text myself.”

“What…what did you say? I could have sworn you said you texted my mother. Isn’t that like the first sign of the apocalypse or something?”

“I assure you that it was difficult, but the pillars of civilization are still standing.” Regina answered sarcastically.

“You’re just full of surprises.”

“My dear, you have no idea.”

“Educate me then.”

Regina paused, knowing that what she was about to say was going to garner a curious response. “I’m going to visit Rumple.”

“Really?” Emma’s tone was hesitant. “He’s an odd little man.”

“He is, and a very powerful one. There is something…different about him, and paying him a visit seems like the logical thing to do. I was invited after all.”

Emma was silent for a few seconds. “I agree there is something different. I saw him on the pier one morning. He gave me some very interesting advice, and he looked…happy.”

Something blossomed in Regina’s chest. It was refreshing to not have her motives questioned…to be believed in. Then, there was happy. Regina wished that one day soon she would wear that emotion well. Rumple was a tortured creature with a past that rivaled her own. If he could do it, maybe there was hope for her as well.

It was indeed okay to hope again. It made her warm inside.

“Why do you think he invited you over?”

“I’m not sure. The invitation was intriguing at best, and after this morning, I felt compelled to follow through with it.”

“You dreamt about him didn’t you?”

A bolt of familiar heat suffused Regina. She was beginning to think this woman knew her inside and out. “I did.”

“It was bad too.”

It wasn’t phrased as a question. “It was. Henry helped. It seems you two have found the time to talk a lot about me.

“Mm, well, you are one of our favorite subjects.” Emma said with a smirk in her voice.

The bolt of heat spread slowly. “Only one of them?”

“Okay…the favorite subject. Is that better?”

“Much.”

“I have a question about all of this. How do you know he didn’t make you dream about him?” Emma asked.

“He didn’t. I would have felt him.”

“Mm, okay. Come see me afterward if you’re up to it?”

“That was a part of my plan.” Regina answered.

“Oh really? Care to share what else is up your sleeve?”  Her voice lowered. Emma flirted shamelessly.

Regina chuckled. “What would you like?”

Emma actually groaned. “You any way I can get you…in a skirt, pant suit, or naked with a big red bow?”

“My, you don’t ask for much do you?” Regina flushed with heated memories.

“Not at all.”

Feeling a bit more confident, Regina muttered, “Let’s start with dinner…alone.”

“When?” Emma’s tone was hopeful.

“Tonight.”

“Should I bring my handcuffs? Nightstick?”

Regina laughed.

“Keep laughing, and I’ll show up in full uniform.”

“You say it like it’s a bad thing.”

“Damn, you’re good at this.” Emma countered.

“I am, and you’re not bad yourself Sheriff.”

“Uh huh. I’ll see you after your visit. Can’t wait to hear about that.”

Regina made a sound in the back of her throat. It was definitely going to be interesting.

_SQSQSQSQSQ_

Regina parked her car at the corner of the pawn shop. For several minutes, she watched the residents trickle by. Life went on around her in spite of her presence in the town…in spite of her own circumstances. Life had never stopped. She was the one who gave up and abandoned the fight.

Now, she was back swinging again.

Getting out of the car, Regina slid on her shades and looked at the nondescript building. Perhaps this was just another piece of the puzzle…another link in the chain. It had to fit somehow otherwise she wouldn’t be here.

The bell jangled loudly as she pushed opened the door. Nothing had changed. The lighting was dim and the shelves were stacked with oddities, bric-a-brac, and other treasures. The air was stale and over ripe with scented air fresheners.

Belle smiled at her in greeting and her eyes glinted knowingly as if she knew some secret. Regina dipped her head in return and ambled forward. The approaching thump of a familiar cane alerted her to Rumplestiltskin’s physical presence, having felt him magically some time ago.

“Ah, somehow I knew you’d honor me with your presence sooner rather than later.”

Regina rolled her eyes. “I’m sure you did. You asked me to come after all.”

He tsked. “We both know you’re not here because I asked, dearie. You’re here because you want to be.”  Rumple peered in Belle’s direction. His smile for her was soft, warm. “Can you excuse us for a while, Belle?” She nodded and whisked past them but not before giving his arm an affectionate squeeze.

Regina eyed the display critically. For a man whose every move was calculated and meaningful, he appeared to be nothing but sincere in his interaction with Belle. It was a sight to behold.

They peered at each other in silence for several seconds as if analyzing. Regina smiled in hopes it would disarm him. There was something definitely different.

His eyes twinkled.

“So?” Regina asked.

“This town could be mine in every sense of the word.”

“True.”

“The Charmings’ heads could be mounted on the telephone poles.”

“Also true.”

“And you dearie could be dead or under my thumb.”

Regina’s mouth twitched and slashed into a cruel smile even as fear hollowed out her stomach. “You wouldn’t dare.”

Rumple blinked and smiled. “No…I wouldn’t.” He paused. “But I could if I wished it.”

“Is this why I’m here? To hear you gloat about what could be?” Regina asked irritably.

“Not at all.” He leaned on his cane. “We are creatures of darkness you and I.”

“Mmm,” Regina murmured as she continued to study him.

“We always will be, Regina. We are …were driven by hate, revenge and cruelty. It blackened us and scarred us forever.”

They stared at each other. No truer words had ever been spoken.

“We can’t exist that way in this world.” Rumple added.

“That’s not true, and you know it.”

Rumple smirked. “Oh, we can survive but we can’t truly be. There is a difference. Tell me, now that your life has been touched by Henry…by Emma would survival be enough for you?”

Regina scoffed. “Of course not! I wouldn’t fight for it otherwise.” There was no need to hide her struggle. He had the gift of sight after all.

“I agree completely. My past actions cost me my son. He’s in this world somewhere, but I know that if I should find him as The Dark One I will lose him again.  If I find him as a man flawed and learning, I have a chance.”  He walked toward her. “Then, there is Belle. She fell in love with the beast in me and stays because of the man. I want to live my remaining years out in peace if it’s possible. It’s something I’ve never had before, and that means I have no quarrel with you.”

Suspicious, Regina asked, “Why are you telling me all of this?”

“I was your teacher once. There is no love lost between us but there is a respect…an understanding despite the trickery and deception.”

It was an accurate depiction, but still, Regina chuckled in disbelief. “Am I to believe that love has tempered you? And respect made you lend a helping hand?”

“Why not? Hasn’t it done the same for you? You were the most ruthless, cunning and gifted witch of your age. What are you now?”

She gasped. “I—“

“Yes. That’s my point. We have spent so much time in the dark---“

“That it’s hard to know who to be,” Regina finished.

Rumplestiltskin laughed. “That’s just it. Be who you are. Be ruthless when you need to be. Be cunning, but let them be a part of you as well.”

The room closed in on Regina before it burst open again… wide and cavernous. Isn’t  that what she had been doing? There was a side to her that was kind, giving, but there was also a side of her that could be admittedly cruel, indelicate and scathingly sarcastic.

It had been easier to not have the constant heaviness of darkness encompassing her, even though it was still present but shallowly buried. It had been easier to breathe; easier to see; easier to be. It was the darkness that pushed her toward the light. Breath rushed from her chest, and her eyes widened in epiphany. “You mean---“

Rumple nodded. “Be grey. I have a feeling that it suits you quite nicely.”

Regina let the word reverberate. She let the concept seep into her pores. Emma had fallen for her at the height of her reign of lies and deceptions, and she had still returned when Regina was broken by them. “It can not be that simple.”

“I never claimed it to be. It’s a balancing act, and it can be a precarious one. When in doubt, I look to Belle. She’s never failed me, but now I listen.”

Silence lapsed between them once more. Rumplestiltskin finally pierced it. “Mull it over, dearie.”  He dipped his head in finality and limped toward the back where Belle had disappeared what seemed like a lifetime ago.

Now alone, she felt out of place and unwelcome. Regina retreated. Her mind churned. It made sense…all of it did, and all she had to do was trust it and herself. It was indeed easier said than done, but the rising feeling of hope could not be a fluke.   It quickened her step and lifted her spirits. Maybe she couldn’t trust it yet. Still, she was more than willing to put the theory to the test, but right now, all roads led to Emma.

SQSQ

Upon entrance to the police station, Regina heard a familiar voice but refused to let it impede her progress. She rounded the corner to see Emma sitting at the edge of her desk and Red in a convenient chair.

Emma saw her first. Pale features lit up like the Fourth of July. It actually made Regina’s heart quiver.

“Hey!” Emma stood and rushed toward her.

Regina’s answering smile felt large enough to encompass the whole room. “Hello, yourself.”

Emma reached out grasping her by the elbows, and without an ounce of hesitation, Regina titled her head back for a kiss.

Red groaned, but Regina ignored it in lieu of Emma’s embrace.

Stepping back, Emma continued to grin. “I didn’t expect you to be done already.”

“We’re magical beings Miss Swan. We didn’t engage in high tea.”

Emma rolled her eyes.

“Wait. You went to see Rumplestiltskin?” Red asked.

Regina bristled. She never understood how this girl could be so self-righteous. They both had the capacity to be monsters. “That’s my business Miss Lucas, and I choose not to discuss it with you.”

Red stood and walked toward them. Her gaze was heated with dislike, suspicion, and Regina wondered if she had the audacity to challenge her after the episode at Granny’s.

“Doesn’t matter. I know all I need to know. You two will forever be bad apples.” Red said accusingly.

Regina met her gaze with a raised brow. Obviously, she did have the audacity and was possibly more emboldened by Emma’s presence. After all, their last meeting together had gone famously in the wolf’s favor.

She did wish for a test, and it appeared as if Regina was getting one whether she liked it or not.

Her hackles rose to warning levels, but outwardly, Regina maintained an unaffected demeanor. She sighed and stepped away from Emma who was watching the both with wide eyes. “That is the problem with idleness, Miss Lucas. One tends to over think things. I think you need something to do.” Regina grabbed a gaming magazine from Emma’s desk and threw it in Red’s direction. “Here. Fetch.”

Red’s face blazed as she automatically caught what was thrown. She glanced at the magazine in her hands then at the floor. Silently, Red put it back where it belonged. “I’ll catch you later, Emma,” she murmured.

Then, Red Riding Hood was gone.

Satisfaction surged in Regina’s blood.

Emma cleared her throat. “Well, I didn’t expect that to happen, but damn.”

“I won’t apologize,” Regina huffed quickly.

“Have I ever really asked you to?”

Regina bit her bottom lip as they peered at each other.

“I didn’t think so. Besides, she kind of deserved it. It’s time we all moved on. They give you too much power by holding on to all this shit when they should be taking care of their own asses.”

Regina studied Emma closely. Her body language was relaxed, open, and her face was alight with sincerity. “You mean that don’t you?”

Emma’s face scrunched in confusion. “Yeah, wouldn’t have said it otherwise.”

Taking two steps forward, Regina crushed their bodies together. She wrapped her hands around Emma’s torso, nearly clawing at her shoulders and hiding her face in the warmth of Emma’s neck.

“Whoa,” Emma chuckled. “You okay?”

 _Be grey_.

It was a fortunate confluence of events for Red to be present with figurative claws extended ready to draw Regina’s blood. It had been a minute test by any standards, but everyone

Regina brushed her lips over soft skin before answering, “Yes I am.”

SQSQSQSQSQ

Emma peered around her empty office then toward the vicinity of the exit.  She released an irritated breath into the air. Patience had never been one of her strong suits. She had learned a little more of it over the past few weeks, but that did not make her an expert. Still, the irritation in no way kept her from noticing something:

Regina was different.

Regina was good…different. More than she had been the day before, the day before that and the weeks before that. Emma was a fixer. It should have bothered her to know that she had barely a hand in any of this, but it didn’t. All it did was make her proud.

Proud and irritated because Emma had to wait until dinner to find out what was going on. There was most certainly plenty. It was obvious upon sight. Regina entered the station like she owned it. Confidence had been rolling off her in waves, and then she ripped Red’s head clean off with just a few words.

Emma chuckled. She blushed and looked around embarrassed by her own amusement. Red was a dear friend, and their relationship was solid enough to be blunt to the point of brutality with each other. When Emma thought she was wrong, she would tell her and vice versa sometimes in the loudest way possible. What happened earlier was no different.

Her thoughts returned to Regina as she reminded herself that with the blast of confidence there had also been a moment of glaring vulnerability. It confused her for a moment because there was no need for it. Emma had knowledge of Regina at her worst and still came running back because it was where she belonged.

There was nothing Regina could show her at this point that change the way she felt. Emma was sure of it, but she had to figure out how to make Regina sure of it too.  The hope Emma had harbored for a while now moved closer to the surface. She sighed, and patience, even though it was painful and aggravating seemed to always pay off in the end, especially concerning Regina Mills.

SQSQSQSQSQ

_Emma sighed and gritted her teeth at the pain blossoming on Regina’s face. She stood and turned away to hide it, but Emma knew it was there. She was tired of feeling helpless. It was time to put her foot down. She peered at her son’s red face still filled with suspicion and anger. Emma hoped he could be eased back into Regina’s life, but so far it had not worked. Enough was enough._

_“Regina… wait.”_

_Emma took the seat closest to her son. As Regina turned, she pleaded with her eyes to hold on…to stay in the moment._

_Regina’s shoulders dropped and soft brown eyes held acquiescence._

_Emma looked down at Henry. His lips tightened. “I don’t trust her!”_

_She squeezed his shoulder. “Look at her, kid. What do you see?”_

_Henry held Emma’s gaze for a moment before it strayed reluctantly._

_“Really look at her.”_

_Mother and son stared at each other silently._

_Henry glanced away then down at his lap.  “What did you see?” Emma asked again._

_“I hurt her,” he whispered._

_“Yeah, you did. You do every time you do this.”_

_“But Grandma says---“_

_“I don’t care what she says. I’m telling you that woman right there is more of a mother to you than I ever was despite her past.”_

_Regina gasped, drawing Emma’s gaze and making her smile in reassurance._

_“I love her, Henry, and you’re not stupid. You know what that means.”_

_“You’re not going anywhere.”_

_“No, I’m not. I’m right where I want to be with her and you no matter what your grandparents say. We’re a family, and it’s time for you to get on board.”  Emma paused and brought his eyes back up to her own. “She could have burned this town ten times over after all this time.”_

_“I know.” He said grudgingly._

_“Now, stop listening to what everyone is saying. They are stuck in the past. Do you want to be there too?”_

_“No,” Henry sighed._

_“What does your superpower tell you?”_

_Henry looked from one mother to the other. “That this is real. That she loves me.”_

_“I know it’s early stages yet, but always listen to it, Kid. It will never steer you wrong.”_

_Henry nodded and his shoulders sagged. His sudden sob pierced the air. “I-I’m sorry. I don’t want to fight anymore. I just thought…it was what I was supposed to do.”_

_Emma hugged her son, bringing him to her chest. Her eyes met Regina. Brown orbs shone with a light Emma hadn’t seen before. “You okay?” Emma mouthed._

_Regina shook her head and brought a hand to her lips in attempt to hide the trembling Emma had already seen._

_Henry turned from her embrace to peer at his adoptive mother. “I’m sorry.”_

_Regina’s breath hitched loudly. Without so much as a word, she ran up the stairs._

_“Mom!”_

_Emma stood in shock but wiped what she hoped to be a soothing hand over Henry’s brow. “It’s okay. I think she’s just overwhelmed. You sit tight. I’ll go check on her.” When she was at the foot of the stairs, Emma repeated firmly. “Stay here. I mean it.”_

_Henry rubbed at his eyes and nodded._

_Emma moved quickly up the stairs and was relieved to see the master bedroom door ajar. Confusion stopped her for a few seconds, but determination pushed her inside, closing the door behind her. “Regina?”_

_The light was on in the bathroom. Emma followed it, stopping in the doorway. Regina leaned over the sink. Her entire body seemed to quake. Alarmed, Emma stepped forward. “Regina?! What—“_

_Before she could utter another word, fists flew at her in unorganized fashion. “What the fuck!” Emma grabbed hold of Regina’s wrists, ending the onslaught. “What is wrong?!”_

_Regina’s chest heaved, and tears dripped, leaving tracks in her makeup. Her face was red, blotchy, but she was beautiful even then. “I-I didn’t want this to happen, but I couldn’t stop it,” Regina murmured. “I’ve never met anyone like you.”_

_Emma blinked and loosened her hold. “Okay, is that a bad thing?”_

_Regina stepped forward, removing herself from Emma’s grasp but invading her space until barely a hair could fit between them._

_Emma swallowed hard, and her heart thudded almost painfully against her rib cage like it always did when this woman was close. The intensity in brown eyes was blinding. She could barely stand to look into them, but didn’t dare look away. Finger tips brushed her cheek, and Emma leaned into the caress._

_“No, there’s nothing bad about it. You gave me back my son.” Regina whispered. “And I am so in love with you—“_

_Emma’s jaw dropped and a cornucopia of feelings suffused her: heat, relief, joy, and more happiness than she knew what to do with.  “Oh God,” she muttered raggedly.  She brought Regina’s hand to her lips, searing it with a reverent and thankful kiss before surging the minute distance forward to take ownership of a heart that had just been freely given._

_SQSQSQSQSQ_

Emma grabbed the handheld game system and leaned back in her chair. She could do patience. She could, knowing the payoff would be well worth the wait.

**SQSQSQ**

Don't be afraid. That box is still there. It won't bite, but I might. *wriggles eyebrows*


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Final story in the Black, White, and Grey series. Post curse but with none of the convoluted mess of this season. Regina isn't herself and Emma is desperate for a return to normalcy.

**A/N:**   **So, I wanted to let you guys know...I'm really a guy..... LOL just kidding but now that I have your attention with the author notes, let's start with this. This chapter is almost all in Regina's POV. This has been her journey all along. Second, this story is not cannon except for the curse; how the curse ended; how Emma defended Emma blah blah. Third, we are near the end. There is only one more chapter after this one. I'm a little nervous about this chapter as well. I hope I did her journey justice and made it as real a possible for you all.**

( Also... there is a rather long flashback in Italics.)

* * *

 

Regina basked in the heat and softness that seemed to surround her. Long legs slithered against her own and arms tightened around her torso. Emma held on to her as if she were afraid of letting go. Regina relaxed into the embrace as her eyes opened slowly. A beam of light filtered in through the curtains of the master bedroom. Minute dust particles were held captive in the singularity. It was a fitting analogy because she was definitely captivated by the woman holding her, and Regina was a willing prisoner. They fit perfectly. They always have. Two distinguishing book ends one light and the other dark. Perfect foils that have somehow found their paths crossed and intermingled.

Emma’s breathing was slow and deep, flittering over Regina’s neck and leaving pleasant shivers in its wake.  It reminded her that she was alive. It reminded her that she was loved. It reminded her that she was wanted. Regina stilled herself not willing to destroy the moment and the perfection it brought with it. So much had changed in her life. There was a time when moments like these would petrify her so she simply prevented them from happening with anyone. Vulnerability had always been a precursor to her downfall, and now being totally exposed to this woman made her feel ten feet tall.

Correction twenty feet.

The first ten feet were her own doing. The pieces of her life were firmly coming together, and Regina was in awe of herself for having the patience and wherewithal to put them together properly without cutting corners. The Evil Queen was dead indeed, but Regina knew now that her ghost would always linger, mingled with the woman she had become: a woman who had always loved fiercely and protected who and what she loved. The difference was that she was open enough to show it and be loved in return. With each second that ticked by, Regina was becoming more and more settled with who she was becoming. She was not evil personified nor was she teeming with righteousness. Then, there was the icing on this proverbial cake, and it was the sweetest of all. Emma was settling with it as well.

Emma mumbled in her sleep and moist lips brushed against the back of Regina’s neck.

Regina closed her eyes as her breathing hitched. There was always something about this woman in the past and even now. Each touch ripped Regina open, exposing her core. It had been empty before, but now it was overrun with so much that at times Regina felt it seeping through still remaining cracks. It should have frightened her to no end, but all she felt was relief. She felt safe. She felt like this was home.

Emma was her home.

There was nothing in her former life that Regina did to deserve this, but whatever angel or fairy godmother that had been lacking before was certainly present nowadays in attempt to make amends.

Emma’s arms tightened around her even more, and Regina could do nothing to hold back the sound of contentment that exited her throat.

It was not enough to stir Emma. It was as if she knew that this was making Regina happy. Then again, Emma always seemed to know what to do or to say even if it meant leaving.  Emma’s moving out had been one of the worst things, but Regina also realized it was one of the best as well because last night never would have happened.  A smile tugged at Regina’s lips as she made the acknowledgement. It needed to happen.

SQSQSQSQSQ

_Regina sprinkled feta on the finished dish as the kitchen door swished open._

_“Hey, I let myself in.”_

_“You’re just in time then.” Regina said as she turned._

_Emma sat the bottle of wine on the counter and stared._

_There was a pang of self-consciousness, but Regina pushed it away. Emma’s eyes were wide and she could see her throat bob on a swallow. Those were her obvious tells. Emma liked what she saw. A frisson of heat inched down Regina’s spine._

_“Is something wrong Miss Swan?”_

_Emma smirked. “You know there’s not. How do you do that?”_

_Regina quirked a brow. “What?”_

_“Don’t what me Regina. The slacks and vest…it should butch you up, but damn.”  Emma ambled forward and fingered the lapel of the crisp white shirt. “I like this a lot,” she whispered before bringing their lips together. The caress was soft with an edge of restraint. Regina wrapped her hands around Emma’s neck and clung to her._

_They parted reluctantly. Foreheads met._

_“You feel good,” Emma muttered._

_“So do you.”_

_Emma eyes were alight with banked fire. She cleared her throat and stepped away, giving them some distance. “So what smells so good?”_

_Regina smiled and let the awareness between them fall to the background. It was always there anyway right underneath the surface. “A derivation of your favorite meal, lamb burgers and sweet potato fries.”_

_Emma beamed. “You’re kidding?”_

_Shrugging, Regina answered. “We’ve had burgers before.”_

_“Yeah, turkey burgers.”_

_“I decided to dress things up a little bit.”_

_“You always do. So, tell me. Is there anything you can’t do?”_

_Regina bit her bottom lip and smiled around it. “I have many skills, Miss Swan.”_

_Emma threw her head back and laughed. “Okay, Xena.”_

_“Who?” Regina asked._

_Emma rolled her eyes and sighed. “Never mind just something to put in the Netflix queue.”_

_“Mmm.” Regina picked up their plates. “Shall we retire to the dining area?”_

_Emma nodded and followed with the bottle of wine and opener in tow._

_Regina watched as Emma tore into her food. She ate just like she did everything with childlike abandon. It made her grin. At first she had been disgusted but now there was only amusement._

_Emma groaned and wiped her mouth with a napkin. “God that’s good.” She smirked in Regina’s direction. “What no candles?”_

_Regina scoffed. “That’s not us, dear.”_

_Chuckling, Emma nodded her head. “No, it’s not. Just wanted to make sure I had your attention.”_

_It was a statement that brokered no response. Emma had her attention since the first day she ventured into town._

_“So, I’m trying to be patient, but I’m vibrating here. What did you want to talk to me about and what happened with Gold?”_

_Warmth bubbled inside Regina, and it felt like belief. It felt like confidence. “You lasted a lot longer than I thought you would.”_

_“Regina.” Emma’s tone was a warning._

_“I’ve returned almost all of the hearts.”  The words fell from her lips as if it were the easiest thing in the word. In truth, it had been._

_Emma’s mouth fell open. “What? How?”_

_“The same way I took them. Magic.”_

_Emma’s gaze went from shock to awe. “There’s no stopping you once you set your mind to something is there?”_

_Regina grinned. “No, there isn’t.” She paused. “Glad I’m using that power for good now are you?”_

_As if studying her, Emma was quiet for a few seconds. “I know we talked about it before, but you didn’t do this to please me did you?”_

_Shaking her head, Regina answered. “It wasn’t about you, no.”_

_“Good. I’d hate you to think I wanted you to turn into June Cleaver or anything.”_

_“No, but I’m not The Evil Queen anymore either, Emma.”_

_“I’m well aware of that.” Emma took a sip from her wine glass. “But, you know what? I love her too.”_

_Breath left Regina in a mighty whoosh. “I—what?”_

_“Before the curse was broken…before I even knew it existed I was falling in love with you. I’m surprised you didn’t know that.”_

_She did somewhat, but to hear it as an actual reality was another thing entirely. “I knew you wanted---“_

_“To get under your pencil skirt?”_

_“Crudely put, but yes.”_

_“Oh, I did.”_

_Their gazes met._

_Regina was floored. Conflicting emotions fought within her._

_“You thought no one could love The Evil Queen,” Emma whispered. “I wasn’t kidding before. I love you no matter who you are. It was hard reconciling what you did with who you are…were, but I understand it.”_

_Regina looked down into her plate. She had barely touched her food, but she did notice the wet sheen that began to cover it. Regina wiped at her eyes and realized that there were tears dripping down her face. The sudden feel of Emma’s touch was no surprise. Fingertips ghosted over her cheek, lifting her head toward Emma’s gaze. In green eyes, Regina saw understanding and acceptance, but still she had to ask. “How can you love her?”_

_“She’s a part of you Regina. How can I not love her?”_

_Regina sobbed. “He was right. He’s the last person I wanted to believe…the last person to give advice, but he’s right.”_

_“Who?” Emma asked softly as she wrapped her arms around Regina._

_“Rumple.” Regina mumbled into Emma’s neck._

_“About what? I don’t understand.”_

_Regina was reluctant to leave the warmth, but she pulled away regardless. “I’m not a nice person, Emma. Not all the time. I can’t be, but---”_

_“I know that.” Emma brushed at errant tears._

_Releasing a shuddering breath, Regina continued. “But you know how I feel about you…about Henry.”_

_“Yes. You’re nice to us. Well, most of the time.” Emma smiled contritely._

_It was not the time to make a joke, but somehow, Emma succeeded in doing so. Regina sighed. “He said that I could be that person touched by darkness and love simultaneously.”_

_Emma’s forehead scrunched. She looked surprised. “Really? Rumplestiltskin said that? Belle must really know how to---“_

_“Emma!”_

_“What?! I’m just saying.”_

_“This is serious.”_

_“I know that. What’s his hook?” Emma asked._

_“I contemplated that as well, but there was nothing ominous. He was…content.”_

_“Yeah, I picked up on that too.”_

_They peered at each other in a moment of wonder._

_“It’s good advice.”_

_“Sage.”  Regina added._

_The longer Emma stared the more green eyes twinkled. “Feel better?” She reached for Regina’s hand, intertwining their fingers._

_“I feel…I feel as if I’ve worked hard to get where I am.” Regina felt relieved. She felt as if she were on top of the world. Everything was coming together._

_“You have. I knew there was something there. I could feel it.”_

_Regretfully, Regina added. “I’m not done. There’s something still--”  Despite it all, things still felt incomplete. She had the feeling that it was right there in front of her, waiting for her to grasp it._

_Emma squeezed her hand. “No rush. We’ve got time. I’m not going anywhere.”_

_Regina eyed Emma. “I know you want our life back, and you’re not the most patient---“_

_“Hey, hey I’m working on it. It will pay off in the end. You always have.” She brought Regina’s hand to her lips. “It will be even better this time.” Emma believed it. The truth lay in her gaze._

_“Thank you.” Regina’s words were simple, but she made sure her gaze told a deeper story of devotion._

_Emma beamed and blushed. Then, she changed the subject. “Now, I’m guessing that food isn’t on your mind right now. I’ll clear the table and wrap things up for you for later.”_

_With a raised brow, Regina watched as Emma fluttered around the table. She did not take offense at the change of subject. It was overwhelming all of this, and as Emma disappeared behind the kitchen door, Regina knew just how to relax the atmosphere and give them a much needed emotional reprieve._

_Regina stood; removed her shoes; and unbuttoned her vest on her way to the family room. She had barely entered before her name was called. “Regina?”_

_“In the family room.”_

_The clop of booted feet heralded Emma’s arrival. “What are you doing in here?”_

_Regina picked up a bag from the sectional. “I have something for you.”_

_Green eyes lit up. “Is that a---“_

_“Game store bag, yes.”_

_Emma’s expression was joyful then hesitant. “You’re going to let me play Xbox? That’s no fun for you.”_

_“I don’t think there’s anything you do that doesn’t amuse me in one form or another, dear.”_

_Emma smirked. “I’m going to take that as a compliment even though I know there’s a dig in there somewhere.” She paused. “So, what’s in the bag?”_

_Regina rolled her eyes. “The clerk said you would enjoy this based on your usual selection.”_

_Moving closer, Emma’s eyes widened as the contents were revealed. She gasped. “Holy shit! You got me the Mass Effect Trilogy?!”_

_Smirking, Regina answered, “Should I assume that this is a good thing?”_

_“You bet your sweet ass it is!” Emma snatched the video game collection and looked at it in awe. Then, as if Regina had given her a pony for Christmas, Emma threw her arms around her.  Her enthusiasm was infectious._

_Regina chuckled. “Should I get the lights and the popcorn?”_

_“Yeah, if you don’t mind. You’re going to love this one. It’s even better than the one I was playing before.”_

_“So this one has sex?”_

_Emma snorted. “Oh yeah.”_

_Regina shook her head in mock exasperation as she made her way out the door. A few minutes later she returned with a bowl filled with popcorn and a beer. Emma had made herself comfortable. Shoes were off and her feet were up as she watched the flashing screen._

_It almost seemed like an ordinary day in their life before all of this happened. Regina decided that this was a good thing. Bumping, Emma’s legs playfully, Regina sat everything on the table._

_Emma peered up at her with a wide smile that seemed to flicker in the muted light. Slowly the smile fell as her hand lifted. Regina leaned toward it and closed her eyes as the callused palm brushed her cheek. When she opened them again, Regina sank inside the burning intensity of Emma’s gaze._

_Green eyes were fathomless and in them, Regina saw her past; her present; and her future. In them, she saw hunger. She saw need, and she saw love._

_“You’re worth waiting for…you know that?” Emma’s voice was soft, husky. “You’re so goddamned beautiful. It hurts to look at you sometimes.”_

_Regina’s breathing hitched as her stomach knotted. No one had ever seen her the way Emma did, and she knew that no one ever would. This was her beginning and her end. “So many people wanted to bring me to my knees, but you do it just by looking at me.”_

_Fingertips trailed over her lips, and Emma’s thumb rested there tracing the path of moist flesh. Heavy sparks arced up Regina’s spine, leaving her virtually breathless. Renewed awareness crackled around them, reminding her of the overwhelming need they had for each other. It had been dormant, but it had awakened._

_It needed to be fed._

_“Emma,” Regina whispered._

_Emma’s arms snaked around her waist, pulling her forward onto Emma’s lap._

_Regina’s breathing went decidedly ragged, and for a moment they breathed the same heated air. With a groan, Emma brought them together. The kiss was soft at first. Lips brushed, lifted, and clung. Regina knew she was loved. She knew she was cherished, but right now, she needed more. She nipped at Emma’s bottom lip, hard enough to leave her gasping…hard enough to make her growl._

_Then, Regina knew what it was to be devoured; to be conquered; and to be loved with such hunger. She gave herself over to it willingly.  When Emma’s a tongue flicked her bottom lip, she trembled. When it teased the roof of her mouth, Regina cried out. When it finally slid against her own, she was irrevocably lost._

_A powerful surge of arousal slithered through her body, heating her from the inside out. Wetness pooled, leaving her throbbing and needy. Regina’s fingers dug harshly into Emma’s shoulders before tangling in blond tresses. She pulled, begging Emma to open wider to take her in deeper._

_Hands slithered down Regina’s back, mapping each clothed muscle before sliding over firm more pliant flesh. Her hips rolled in direct response, causing a simultaneous moan. Once the motion started, Regina found that she could not stop it._

_Emma’s hands squeezed, spurring her on, but when she felt a return thrust, the warm gush became a rampant wave. The friction was erotic and did nothing to relieve swollen throbbing flesh. It only served to make her hungrier._

_“Jesus Regina!” Emma wrenched away and cried out after a particularly viscous roll of hips._

_A shrill sound interceded from seemingly far away._

_Regina brushed a fingertip over kiss swollen lips before covering them with her mouth once more._

_The sound continued and seemed to get louder._

_Whimpering in protest, Regina mumbled, “Ignore it.”_

_“I can’t. I’m the sheriff, remember?” Emma groaned._

_The ringing stopped and then, almost immediately, it started up again._

_It was painful to stop and almost impossible. Harsh breathing provided the baseline for the chirping cell phone. Regina leaned in for one more kiss before bringing their foreheads together._

_Emma’s hands dug into her hips. “Stop it.” She pleaded._

_“I’m trying.” Regina murmured helplessly._

_Emma fished her phone from her pocket. “Yeah?” She said breathlessly. After a few seconds of silence on her end, Emma sighed. “I’ll be there in a few minutes.”_

_They looked at each other._

_It sobered Regina even more because she knew what was coming._

_Emma’s smirk was lascivious. “Saved by the bell? I have to go. Domestic disturbance.”_

_“Mmm. Saved from what?”_

_“It’s been a long dry spell for both of us. It was probably not the best thing to do.”_

_Regina bore down with her hips and sneered. “Did it feel like it?” She asked into Emma’s open mouth._

_“Hell no,” Emma gasped._

_Regina smiled at her well- earned confession, but she acknowledged grudgingly that Emma was right. It probably was not the best idea to rush this. “You’re right, however. We have all the time in the world.”_

_She shivered as Emma’s hands sifted through her hair. “Can I come back? I promise I won’t touch you…at least not that way.”_

_“You mean sleep here?”_

_Emma nodded. “Do you know how long it’s been---“_

_“Yes.”  Just the thought of it settled something in her, and at the same time melted something in her as well. “I’ll leave a light on in case you’re late.”_

_“What about Henry? I could bring him—“_

_“No, I made arrangements he’s staying with his grandparents tonight.”_

_“Good, I think we need this.”_

SQSQSQSQSQ

Regina bit her bottom lip around a smile and could barely contain the flurry of happy that soared through her.

“If you don’t stop wiggling that ass of yours…” Emma muttered sleepily.

The flurry became a storm, and Regina reveled in it.  “I wasn’t aware that I was.”

“Uh huh, plus you were thinking so loud I could almost hear you.”

Regina turned over until they were facing each other almost nose to nose. “Good things, Miss Swan.”

“Oh really? Anything you want to share?”

Regina wiped stray blond tresses from Emma’s forehead so she could see green eyes unfettered. “I love you.”

Emma shuddered and a bright flush covered her face. Her eyes held wonder and such joy it was almost blinding. She opened her mouth to speak, but Regina quieted her with a finger to her lips.

“I know I don’t say it enough, but it’s there. I’m starting not to remember when it wasn’t.”

Emma’s answering smile was priceless. “I like waking up like this.”

“As do I.”

“I didn’t know we could be this mushy…I like it.”

Regina chuckled. “No one could be quite as eloquent as you, dear.”

Emma’s eyes narrowed. “I’m not that blond you know.”

Smirking, Regina countered. “And that’s in reference to…”

“The sarcasm that seems to flow from you like a river at times.”

“That river flows with love.”

Emma laughed. “Oh, I know, but that sass of yours makes me either want to kill you or fuck you.”

Regina made a sound of amusement. “The latter is a lot less messy.”  She ran her hands underneath Emma’s tank top to warm skin and toned muscle.

Arching into the touch, Emma hissed, “I don’t know. I like having you all over me.” She nipped at Regina’s chin before flicking her tongue over full lips.

The air burned between them.

“I thought we said we…wouldn’t do this,” Regina gasped as her stomach clenched.

Their lips brushed.

“Then stop.”

“I didn’t start this!” Somehow Regina managed to sound aroused, outraged and amused at the same time.

“It feels good doesn’t it?” Emma asked as she brought their bodies flush…breast to hip.

“Mmm, you always do.”

Emma released a bark of laughter. “Thanks for that, but I wasn’t talking about that. I meant this…us…this thing between us where we can’t be near each other and not touch or want to. It makes me feel like a teenage boy.”

Regina’s grin was slow, crooked and dirty. “There are so many comments I could make to that, but yes, it is nice having this again.”

Lips met again.

“Maybe we should have more of these sleep overs.”

“I think I’d like that.”

Emma peered at her and waited with raised brows.

“What?”

“I’m waiting for you to give me a schedule.”

Regina rolled her eyes and scowled.

Emma laughed. “Fine. How about this? It’s early yet.” She yawned in reflex. “There’s sleep to be had and then there’s pancakes to make.”

“You’ve learned to cook?”

“Hell no.”

Regina snorted. “Maybe I’m in an omelet mood.”

Emma grinned. “That’ll work too.” She captured Regina’s lips and tweaked her left side.

Regina yelped and glared. “Don’t you dare.”

After a quick flash of teeth, Emma repeated the caress.

Laughter filled the room.

Regina inched away from the touch and swatted at the air, hoping to catch flesh.

“Mom?”

They both jumped apart at the sound of Henry’s voice, covering themselves.

“Henry! What are you doing here?” Regina asked breathlessly.

“Uh, I live here?” His eyes sparkled as he stood in the open doorway.

“We know that, kid, but aren’t you supposed to be at your grandparents?”

“Grandpa dropped me off on his way to the station.”  He looked from one parent to the other before a smile lifted his lips. “You stayed the night.”  Henry’s expression turned thoughtful. “But you’re not naked.”

Emma groaned.

This was a strange situation to say the least. “Henry. Let me explain.” Regina added.

He brushed the explanations away with a wave of his hand. “I know. It’s complicated.”

“I know where he gets his sass from,” Emma mumbled.

Regina glared, and before she could utter another word, Henry came flying toward the bed, landing near the middle but mostly on top of Emma.

“So does this mean you’re coming home?”

Regina peered at Emma over Henry’s head. “Soon, but it’s---

“Complicated?” Henry finished, and it was immediately followed by a squeal as Emma pounced.

Emma chuckled as the room was filled again with peals of laughter.

Regina watched the display with her heart in her throat. She melted in the presence of a warmth so strong in nearly left her speechless. Family. She had a family who accepted her for who she was and who she used to be. It made all the heartache; all the pain; all the years of emptiness disappear. There was only this.

“Mom! Save me!” Henry cried between giggles. He reached out.

Something slid home, and a sense of rightness stole over her. Regina wrapped her hand around Henry’s smaller one. Mother and son gazed back at her, and they looked so happy…with her...because of her. This was the missing piece. She had to see it, feel it, and it filled her with so much pride and love she was overwhelmed by it.

She was a person without it, but this is what made her complete. Regina pulled Henry toward her. He clutched at her and continued laughing. Regina caught Emma’s gaze. With her eyes, she hoped that she was communicating what was bubbling inside.

Emma’s chest heaved and her face shined with such hope. “Regina?” Even her voice was teeming with it.  The message had been received.

Taking a cue from the adults around him, Henry sobered and looked up at his mother. “Mom? You okay?”

Regina covered trembling lips with her hand and willed herself to speak of the emotion that bombarded her. “I-it’s not complicated. It shouldn’t be. I want this. I’ve always wanted this.”

Emma reached for her. “Are you---“

“Please, come home.”

Suddenly, Regina was crushed by two warm bodies. She had never felt so loved.

SQSQ

**Go back and read the author's notes. Then, leave some feedback. It does my heart good, and hey if I make you feel good shouldn't you do the same?**

 


End file.
